You Deserve to Feel Safe on Your Healing Journey
Written by Carolyn Fine
Dear psychedelic-curious adventurer, I see you there with your reading lists and your hopeful heart. Getting ready to explore the shadows. To shine a light on some tender parts, long hidden. I share your hope for some new answers to persistent questions, perhaps some relief from pain that feels older than you. I’m excited for you. If this is brand new territory for you, there are some things you should know.
The world of psychedelics is boundless, but we often mistake it for being just one, benevolent thing. One healing community. It’s not. It’s as vast and diverse as society itself, and just as fraught. It’s love and light, but it’s also rape culture and systems of oppression. For some it is spiritual, for others it’s medical. It’s academic and religious. Wellness and corporate interests. Before jumping in, try to get some clarity on your agenda. Where would you like to go? If you jump without direction, a person or community with an agenda of their own might be there to catch you.
Ensuring a deep sense of safety and trust with your guide
If you’re at the point where you’re ready to connect with a practitioner, know that you have options. Engage with a community of like-minded explorers and don’t accept the first referral you receive out of fear of not finding anyone else. You will find your way. Experiencing a deep sense of safety and trust with your guide is fundamental. This person will be watching over your body as you explore uncharted realms of your psyche and the nature of consciousness itself. It can get dark there. Protective coping mechanisms you normally use to deal with challenging people and situations may not be available to you. When someone is experiencing a non-ordinary state of consciousness, power differentials are intensified. The person holding space for you needs to feel super solid. The most sturdy of tethers.
Here’s the chicken and egg part: Before you really start to heal, developing a sense of discernment about who and what is safe for you can be hard. Especially if you’ve experienced abuse, neglect, or have been gaslit and taught to distrust your intuition. And I hate to say it, but this is the experience of most people under capitalism, patriarchy, and white supremacy. Multiply that effect by infinity if these things have also been present in your intimate relationships with parents, friends, or partners. This might cause you to ignore red flags or rely on people’s credentials instead of listening to your gut.
American culture can be oppressive, and we are always, always being made to deal with institutions, people, and circumstances that challenge or overwhelm us. This is especially true if there are subjugated or marginalized aspects of our identities. Seek out the support of people and communities within psychedelia who share those identities, or who possess a level of cultural competence that creates a sense of safety for you. It doesn’t matter if someone else’s safe person feels “off” to you. This doesn’t mean they’re an unsafe or unethical person, necessarily — that’s really not the point. It just means that they are triggering something for you that’s loaded. If exploring that trigger is not central to the work you’re hoping to do, that person is probably not a good fit for you.
Many practitioners in the (currently unregulated) emerging field of psychedelic therapy have a tremendous amount of education and training behind them, with letters behinds their names. This can help you feel confident that they have some level of skill or expertise, but it absolutely does not guarantee that they are inherently safe or ethical human beings. A good fit for you will be someone who makes your nervous system feel calm. Still not sure if the messages you’re getting from your body are gut fear or gut wisdom? Ask more questions. In fact, ask them directly.
Here are some questions you can ask your prospective guide
- Will there be ceremony or rituals taking place during the session? (If yes, check in with yourself about your comfort level with someone else’s spiritual practice being centered in your experience. Will that feel alienating or distracting for you?)
- Can I bring objects and tools for my own spiritual practice or ways to connect with my ancestors?
- What do you think about the recent allegations of sexual abuse by X?
- What kinds of physical touch do you offer or engage in?
- What is your framework for understanding consent?
- What’s your specialty/favorite area to work in? Who is your ideal client?
- What kind of training have you had?
- What kind of ongoing healing/shadow work do you do, personally? Do you have a supervisor or peer support group to whom you’re accountable?
- If the guide’s gender places them in a position of systemic power above or below you, know that you can ask about the possibility of having a guide or helper of your gender present if that would feel safer for you.
- Ask for references. Is it ok with them if you speak to a previous client who shares your race/gender/sexual orientation?
Track the way they respond to being interviewed by you. This matters almost more than their answers. Are they being dismissive of your concerns, or open and attentive? Do you feel a dominating energy coming towards you, or curiosity and validation? What’s happening in your nervous system? What do you feel in your body? Is there tension, heat, or constriction? Or is there a spacious opening in your chest? Those are gifts of wisdom from your body. Accept them. Ask yourself, are you putting up with anything in this dynamic because you feel like you should be able to? It bothers you, but you don’t think it should? Pay attention to those thoughts. Honoring the urgings and listening to the wisdom from your body may be the very first step on your healing journey.
Be aware of the risks (CW: boundary violations and sexual abuse)
We assume and want to believe in the good intentions and integrity of people who work in helping fields. Of course, we know abuse happens at all levels of society, across industries. Much has been written about ethics and abuse in psychedelic therapy. Brave souls of all backgrounds have been coming forward to call out their abusers and tell their stories of having had their boundaries crossed in myriad ways — including unthinkable abuses of power and sexual assault.
Thanks to the ceaseless efforts of survivors to push this conversation where it needs to go, many groups and community stakeholders are starting to organize and create models of accountability for psychedelic therapists, educators, and those who platform them. We must center survivors and processes of repair at every turn. If you’re a survivor of abuse, you know how shattering it can be. When this happens at the hands of someone who has pledged to support you in a healing process, it’s especially egregious.
We can do absolutely everything in our power to protect ourselves and still be harmed. If that happens, let me be the first to tell you, love, you did not deserve that. It was Not Your Fault. My hope is to empower you just a little bit. You have choice. It doesn’t matter how much experience or education a guide has. Despite all programming we’ve received in our paternalistic model of healthcare to suggest otherwise, no one is more of an expert on you and what you need for your own healing than you are. No one else’s ideas about healing, spirituality, or personal growth will lead you to your own personal liberation. Only you can do that. Take good care on your healing journey.
Resources:
For immediate support regarding sexual violence, call 800–656-HOPE to speak with someone from RAINN (Rape, Assault, and Incest National Network).
To speak to someone about concerns relating to these matters in psychedelic communities, email hello@psychedelicwomen.com
Sexual Abuse in Psychedelic Ceremonies: What You Need to Know
Ending the Silence Around Psychedelic Therapy Abuse
If you exist somewhere outside of the dominant white paradigm, find your people on Instagram:
Psychedelic Liberation Collective
Carolyn Fine works with people who are integrating psychedelics into their healing journeys, and has been doing anti-oppression and equity work in the psychedelic community since 2018.
Follow her on socials @the.iridescent.mind
