The question

Joshua Morakeas
Nov 4 · 2 min read

The question.

The question I would ponder on is what happens when I die.

Is was a question so important to me, I remember thinking about it so much I got an anxiety attack, I called the child lifeline to try and talk to someone about how I was feeling because I had no idea what was going on. The one piece of advice that saved me was “try go for a run” so I did.

In a panic I put my shoes on and ran out the front door in desperation to outrun the demon named anxiety which felt like was eating my soul. After a few moments. The deep breaths came… In the nose, out the mouth. The smell of the trees and the earth was prominent. The stars more bright and defined than ever. And the wind blowing, playing its beautiful tune. It was like Mother Nature was holding me in her arms. Loving me. And reminding me. That I have nothing to fear. As I am not alone. I never was and i never will be.

Before the high school, distractions and the ego lifting. I was a cross country runner. Winning junior champion in my primary school. Most nights I would go for runs around the block with my dad. So running for me brought back a strong feeling of connection to myself I’ve lost.

Going for a run that night reminded me how important it is to move. If you stay still and stagnant all the energy you work up in your mind through the day doesn’t get burnt up and just eats away at you causing problems like anxiety and depression. Although it’s not the only solution. Moving is a great first step into enlightenment and growth. Your physical body is your vessel. You live in this beautiful biological machine and over time it builds up toxins. Just like the ground build up weeds, your mind and your body get affecting by the weeds of the world. The constant thinking, judgement, social media, TV, dealing with toxic co-workers and people and the list goes on. Running and deep breathing, more importantly the act of exercising and meditation is the way to air out your body, it’s the way to pick the weeds out of your physical and mental body and keep you clean and fresh so you may grow. Physically. Mentally and Spiritually.

Ultimately this expierence was my process to staying Present.

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