No worries. I definitely think for some people where non-monogamy feels more ‘natural’ to them, being monogamous can feel like they’re being untrue to who they are. Some people just operate better in monogamy. I think what I wish is that more people felt free to make a choice between different ways of doing relationships rather than being forced either way.
Definitely. I really dislike it when people within the polyamorous community act as if polyamory is the ideal for everyone or better than monogamy as an approach. Different things work for different people.
Thanks for this. Just for the record, I call it ‘non-monogamy’ period. All non-monogamy is/should be ethical. If it’s not ethical, it’s cheating.
And I don’t think that:
- Jealousy is the same as possessiveness or that it’s necessarily an unhealthy - There is anything inherent to polyamory that makes…
I’m not really saying that I need to be androgynous to be agender or that I care what society reads me as. I’m not a “gender non-conforming” person really. I am read as a woman and I don’t dress masculinely so I don’t get read as gender non-conforming and I’m fine with that. Androgyny though as an idea that one can be ‘genderless’ is not a thing…
Please don’t give me that BS of it’s “on me” when you comment directly -to me- about the way I give advice and how I do my relationships. You’re a grown ass adult and you know full well that you don’t just pop by to tell someone how to do something randomly and not know that suggests that they aren’t doing it in a way you think is correct.
I mean… it’s not really up to you to tell other people what their relationship really is. If it’s someone dating and having more than one romantic relationship with someone else, I believe it qualifies as polyamory, non-monogamy or whatever else you want to call it. Just because it’s not how you practice doesn’t mean that’s not what it is.
I don’t understand why people like you write responses to my articles, ignoring the fact I’ve been practicing polyamory for over 7 years and ignore the wealth of responses basically telling me that they are glad I wrote this because beginner polyamory advice is so shit and they’re so grateful that I’m saying things they think that no one else is…
Then they should call it “intimate partner violence” and not “couples privilege” because “couples privilege” isn’t a thing. They should refer to things and systems that actually exist, not words that people co-opt just because they feel hard done by.