One of the most difficult challenges we face in life is overcoming adversity. We set out with a goal, a dream, a plan in place, and during the pursuit, we’re stopped dead in our tracks by an obstacle or seemingly immovable force. We’re left with questions looming, circling thoughts invading our minds, and decisions to make. How could I ever overcome this? This isn’t what I wanted. I never asked for this. What do I do now?
This is the point most people give up. This is the point where feelings of depression and thoughts of inadequacy creep into our subconscious. If we let these questions and ideas take over, it can send even the most emotionally healthy person spiraling. From budding relationships ending, to careers faltering, to families splitting, failure to contain and control those we care about most leaves us with nothing but a decision to make.
While the decision you chose may change, the emotional outcome can remain the same if you allow it. Embrace the weight of the point of failure, fully appreciate its consequences, and decide what to do next — conquering the adverse effects of failure and accepting its positive impact on your life.
When in a time of adversity or while enduring setbacks, consider these three decisions to embrace failure and move forward:
Pot Heavy — Press On
Some people may feel as though there is a point of no return during a journey, a point where a single thought takes over: “I’ve invested too much in failing or turning back now.” As in poker, when the player has too much in the gambling pot to fold the current hand, the player is considered pot heavy and must keep playing. There are times in our lives when this is an excellent trait to have. The never-quit, never-give-up mentality that drives successful people through their failures and to their end goal may be the right avenue for you to get past your obstacle.
If you see the light on the horizon, more than likely, the best decision you can make is to buckle down, maintain course, and persevere through the storm. It is essential never to lose focus on what you want to achieve. If this is you, embrace the effects of this season. Use this time for growth so you can overcome this obstacle and prepare yourself for the next.
Turn Back Around — Start Fresh
When the situation you’re facing is a problem that can’t be fixed, when no amount of time or persistence will result in breaking through the difficulty, it may be time to turn around and start fresh. This doesn’t mean you have given up. It merely means you are trying a different approach to achieve the end goal.
The Law of Diminishing Returns teaches us that just because you invest more of your time and energy into a goal or problem doesn’t mean you’ll see equal positive benefits. Sometimes the longer you pursue it and the more work you put toward it, the more negative effects that you bring on yourself. If you feel you are in a place where you still desire the end goal but what you’re doing has halted progress, consider turning around, taking a step back from the problem, and look at a different way to pursue your goal. Sometimes all you need is a fresh start and a new perspective.
Walk Away — Choose You
Unfortunately, there are times during our journey when the correct decision to make is to abandon the pursuit altogether. Sometimes we aren’t cut out for the plan we once laid out for ourselves. Maybe, you started a side hustle only to see it fail, or you’re pursuing a childhood dream only to meet setback after setback. Sooner or later, you must decide if continuing in the pursuit is best or if walking away would be the most valuable decision of your life.
Take an honest account of your life and determine the things in it that have become a drain on your emotional health; chances are these plates we are spinning are only being turned because we feel the need to keep them from dropping. But if you decided to give up the spinning plates, imagine how much more time and energy you would have to put toward things of meaning that will bring real joy to you and those in your inner circle.
Embrace the Effects of Failure
Failure doesn’t have to be debilitating. It doesn’t have to derail your life. As the late Winston Churchill once said, “Success is not final, failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts.” Life is a journey that takes us through peaks and valleys. Whether you are going through a storm or just coming out of it, I encourage you to let the failure sink in, allow it strengthen you, and then push on with a newfound perspective to enjoy the fullness of life.
written by James Price, LUX Blog Writer
