And therein lies the rub, she says knowing it’s an awful pun. (No regrets!) One person’s perfectly consensual sex act is taboo and a violation to another. There are women who think that sex with a man, of any kind, is rape. While it’s their choice no longer to have sex with men, of any kind, they cannot be allowed to speak for women who don’t share their worldview. Sex in this century has one thing over sex in the last umpteen: it’s now got this added element of “do our values match in this regard?” where before that was assumed. It’s postmodern sex: context is everything.