Use Bait if Necessary

I remember when online dating first got started! This was back when catfish was considered seafood and not some weirdo defrauding people with phony profiles or stealing another person whole identity online and all that psychotic shit. I’m talking about the Golden Age, where the worse offense for somebody might of been posting a two year old picture because they gained a few pounds around the midsection. I’m not judging, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to hook, line and sinker. Back then it was like a secret society and nobody wanted to admit that they tried their luck a few times maybe did a little late night surfing on the POF’s of the world, maybe you were looking for your next ex, or searching for that summer fling or little boo thing. Either way, something about online dating, back in the day was almost considered taboo but yet in still, somewhat honest. Fast forward several years later, and ain’t no telling what type of lunatics you might come in contact with on one of these sites.

So one night, I decided to roll the dice and bite the bullet if you will. I signed up for a 7 day free trial to see what this online hype was all about. After I set up my profile and put a few photos up, I got in boxed from this really cute photogenic chick named Rochelle. The message she sent me read something like this,

Hi there,

“I like your profile, I think your picture is pretty cute, how are you tonight?”


I wrote back,

“Nice to meet you Rochelle, I’m good, just kicking back at home having a cocktail or two..what about you?”

This dialogue between us went on for about 45 minutes or so when she finally wrote “you should give me a call so we can talk like normal people,” I told her, “shoot me the number and I’ll hit you in a few minutes.” I still had a lot of trepidation and apprehension with this chick because this was my first time going online and putting any effort into this. All in all it just seemed to easy and often times if something is to easy, it either doesn’t hold its value or Im not getting the whole story. I obviously wasn’t quite sure how far this was gonna go, but after a couple of vodka and cranberries, I opened up just a bit, besides what harm can ever come from having a friendly chat or two. It was a new kind of fun. We chatted for about an hour made some small talk and got more familiar.

Now, Rochelle was probably about 45 minutes away from where I live, but maybe because of her flirtatious behavior, those provocative photos, and choice of words, let’s just say she kept my attention. Just to be clear, I did have other women in town, (nothing serious) and I really didn’t have to attempt anything long distance wise, but it was something about this chick I couldn’t quite put my finger on, but whatever it was, or what she said or did, she moved herself to the front of the line and got all my attentionan. For a brief couple of days, I was MIA to all these other ladies. No strings attached, was more than likely the common denominator, well and a few other things but I will cover that momentarily. Over the course of the next couple of days we got better acquainted and engaged in a bunch of smutty talk, bottomless sexting and before I knew it, that distance between us started to look a whole lot shorter. From day one, with just about anything my disposition had always been, grab the bull by the horns, so when it came to meet up after a few days of talking, I was all the way with it.

At the end of the day, there is only so many pictures you can send back and forth until eventually your like, fuck it, lets meet up and get this show underway. I can’t lie, I was apprehensive as hell to have this chick I meet online and barely knew, come to my house on our first rendezvous. Again, if she was in town completely story. I looked at it like this, if I wasn’t really feeling her. Would it be fucked up to say, “ know what?’, I hate to tell you this but I gotta keep it real, am not actually feeling you or this, but its probably time to pull the plug, but thanks for coming and sorry it didn’t work out,” don’t get me wrong I would a done it if push came to shove, but the last thing I needed was a potential stalker in my life. I mean technically this girl was still considered a stranger. I figured it might be a easier way that was more favorable for both parties, so when it came down to pulling the trigger, I decided to drive down to her place instead.

“I sent my daughter to my mothers house for a few days, will have the house to ourselves while your here ,” she says to me. “Sounds good to me, I replied. “Oh and by the way before you leave my house in the morning, I’ll make us a nice breakfast and then you can follow me to the gas station and I’ll fill up your gas tank for driving all the way out here to come see me.” In the back of my mind I thought how could any sane person object to that? So, I just said, “Ok”, hung up the phone packed my overnight bag with a few other belongings, rolled up a dubee and fired up the Dodge Charger Hemi and got going on my minor expedition. I left my house about 730pm and stopped at the market to grab a box of Magnums and a lemon squeeze. I already had a half pint of Henny in my console so that part was covered. There was a one brief moment when I got back to my car close closed my door and sat there for a few seconds and really thought if I should make this trip. Was it really worth it? Did I really need to make this trip? Hell yes, besides, the limepit was already dug, the contact was already signed, in other words, it was a done deal after her last comment.

About 30 minutes of me being on the freeway, I got a text from Rochelle that read, “I started to just wait until you got here, but when you do get here, I got a surprise for you. LOL… See ya when you get her!! XOXOXO

Normally, if I’m on the freeway and I receive a text like that, I would just respond with some vague or generic shit, like ok, or my all time favorite, Coo. Not this time though. Instead, a couple of things immediately came to mind. For instance, my first thought was, “I hope and pray this lady ain’t some kind of sadistic dude that lures nice guys like me into his House of Horrors and does a number on me. However, my second thought sounded a bit more rational, What if she likes women too and she has a girlfriend with her tonight and this thing turns into a tryst? Or worse of all, “This could be some sort of set up and I get robbed or jumped. All bullshit aside, it was might of been the reefer I was smoking on the way there, that had me paranoid but nevertheless, my safety comes first.

Without overthinking it, I got off on the next freeway exit, and coincidentally it was the exit I needed to pull of of anyhow. I pulled into a empty Burger King parking lot, parked in a space, popped the trunk and hopped out to grab my good luck charm, I wanted keep it on close to me just in case things got unpleasant or I got a weird vibe. You see, more often than not, if im traveling out of town alone or maybe just to visit some unsavory places, that six shot, Smith and Wesson .38 special that should ordinarily be resting in my trunk was t there there. I didn’t have time to go into full blown panic mode, or even consider driving all the way back home because I didnt have it, so I closed the trunk and head towards her place. It wasn’t until about a week later that actually found out what happened to my .38 and where it was, but that’s another story.

To put this in to perspective, in my city, any day of the week, if am meeting a woman in a area that am familiar with, I would be vigilant but I would never have to take these type of measures. I did the best I could to rationalize with myself and talk myself out any negative thinking . “Fuck it.”, I’ll deal with that shit another time, ain’t no turning back now, are all things that I said to myself , but I swear for God. I felt vulnerable as hell with no protection. Well at least I grabbed condoms that’s some form of protection. 10 minutes later, I found her street in a nice little middle class subdivision of homes. I drove by her house once and went around the corner and just waited at the end of the block, just to see if something didnt look right. A few minutes later, I pulled up in front of her house, walked up to the front door, rang the door bell and the door opened, BOOM, PING, POW!!!

To be continued