I have three emails for you and don’t know which, if any will even reach you. Perhaps, I should attach all three to this and see which one works (that you respond from, if you can).
I see all different kinds of relationships working in this field (home health and hospice). I see families fighting, families bonding, families whom aren’t even blood supporting one another. There is a client whose husband has been caring for her for many years, as his number one priority. She nearly died. He’s spent his every waking moment since making sure she has the best of care, and is as comfortable as he can afford her to be. They still go on trips to other parts of the states, and they always have an aide at her side. The love he has for her is amazing. I see clients whom have dementia and deal with it in different ways. Some are angry that they can’t remember. Some are apologetic. Some are just confused. Some families act as though their loved ones are a strain and they just wish they’d hurry up and die. It’s too much for them to handle any more, I guess. They are trying to live their own lives, yet still trying to support a family member while the rest of the family comes down on them about how they are giving care. It’s really something. Seeing all of these different emotions, inner turmoils, love in ways I’d never even thought of, and loss in the deepest sense.
These things make you look at yourself, your life and wonder what happened. Why have I lost touch with my sister? We both lead such different lives now that it seems like we’d have nothing in common beyond our childhood together. How do Mom and Aunt Chris manage to stay so close after all these years? They had marriages together, children together, they stayed in touch… They are about as far apart in age as you and I. Granted we didn’t get along so well as we grew up, and we butt heads a bit now as adults, but there were times we played together and hung out with each other where we weren’t handcuffed in order to do so.
I can see a few turning points in our lives were we started to move apart, but I realize now as I’m getting older and seeing others much older, that we don’t have to stay that way. We could grow a bond now that we never would have had as kids… Because we’re adults and chose to, not kids being told to get along.
Maybe we could share what’s happening in our lives. Relationships. Jobs. Weather. Political views. World news. Life goes on. I know you’re still out there. I love you. I miss you. I’m reaching out. Even if you can’t respond, I’ll email again real soon. I promise.