I Unfollowed All Of My Friends On Facebook. Here’s What Happened.

“This is the best thing I’ve done on Facebook, since joining Facebook.”

Social Media is one convoluted stock pile of a mess. At least it was for me.

Before I purged my news feed of all the stuff that goes on there, here’s what I see on a daily basis.

People constantly vying for attention using pictures and captions with their vanity on full display.

People pretending as expert commentators and journalists on any recent event or topic of interest they come across.

And people galloping on their high horse feeling righteous trying to one up everyone’s opinions with their own.

Like me.

And I hate it. It’s the same feeling I get whenever I enter a room full of people blabbering on and on to each other when I can give nearly zero fucks about what they say. It’s a big problem.

And I know full well that the problem is me. Or in me. Whatever.

This stern introduction might sound depressingly cynical to you, but the truth is, I am actually extremely happy I did this. It’s powerful and positive stuff. I would go as far as saying this might be the best thing I ever did on Facebook, since joining Facebook. And that you should give it a try too.

Here are some of the reasons why.

Private Messages Still Means Something

The first question on your mind is probably this. Why did I even keep my Facebook at all? I could have deleted my account forever and never turned back.

Yeah well, that’s too convenient. You know what else is convenient?

Facebook messaging.

Everyone and their mothers are on it, literally. Aside from that, it’s not yet clogged with the constant shitstorm of posts people share on their feeds left and right.

In a way, messaging still feels like a private, thoughtful conversation. I’ve always preferred that. I never say hi or greet anyone on their timeline, I send them a message directly.

When I say hi, I feel like it means something. And since I haven’t seen their face next to an irritating 9gag meme on my feed for a while, I feel like I hate them a little less.

Just kidding, I mean, care for them a little more.

You Never Run Out Of Things To Say Or Ask

You’ve probably seen a lot of those pictures of friends hanging out where instead of talking to each other, every single person is on their phone.

What a shame right?

You know what else is? Friends hanging out and talking about the stupidest things they see on their Facebook feeds instead of sharing stories and moments they might have missed about each other.

But wait, no one ever misses out on anything anymore. That’s right. They’ve already shared it…on Facebook.

When one of your friends went to travel for example, you would already know what’s up as soon as it happens. Where they went, who they went with, what food they ate, even the color of their freakin’ bikini, and every little bit and piece of the story, already spoiled.

They have nothing interesting left to talk about.

Except for that viral video of a chameleon escaping a pack of snakes a friend of a mutual friend of theirs shared, which their high school math teacher commented on. They laugh a little. Of course, who wouldn’t? It’s their high school math teacher commenting on a Facebook video!

Shortly after, they fall silent with no idea what to say. Back to the phone again!

You Actually Talk About Important Things

I wish I could tell you what it feels like to hear noteworthy updates and events about a person I care about in person from the person himself.

Well, it feels real.

If it’s great news, I’m filled with wonderment and joy. If it’s the opposite, I feel the weight of it and it really saddens me. Either way, my reaction is genuine and heartfelt.

The thing is, I had a reaction at all.

If I saw a friend suddenly announce on Facebook he’s getting married, I probably would have given it one of my highly coveted likes, commented “grats”, and that’s it. I’d have scrolled down in a matter of seconds and forgotten about it right away.

But if I heard that news from the guy himself when I meet him, it will be different. Not only that I will be truly delighted, I would also be able to tease him “she’s pregnant isn’t she?” and see from the smug on his face that I’m right. It doesn’t matter if I’m right though.

What matters is the news. And because I heard it up close and personal, I will never forget it.

You’ll Be Really Glad When You See Your Friends

A few days back, I saw a friend of mine whom I haven’t seen for quite a long time. She didn’t see me at first and had I not tapped her shoulder as she was walking past me, we wouldn’t have met.

Had I seen her on my news feed that day, I probably wouldn’t have bothered. Calling her and eventually catching up with her for a few minutes was a split second decision I made based on two crucial things.

One, I haven’t seen her for quite a while and I haven’t the slightest idea what’s up with her life at the moment. On good days, I care enough to know. But I didn’t know what’s up with her only because I didn’t see her posts on Facebook.

Two, I kinda felt like I missed her. Turns out, I really did. But then again, only because I didn’t see her on Facebook frequent enough to trick my brain I’ve been meeting her constantly and recently.

In short, I felt the need to see her. And seeing her felt really great. We just don’t get that feeling often anymore, don’t we?

I could go on. Limiting my social media consumption gives me unlimited ideas how it positively impacts my in person social interactions. But I don’t have an axe to grind with social media per se, I actually like it too. It’s convenient.

However, one thing I’ve learned about life is, you never stick to convenience. The things that matter lies beyond comfort, and we should all make it a point to cross the line once in a while.

What was supposed to be a condescending social media fast for me ended up as a benign reminder that as much as Facebook is a good place to connect with people, there remain significantly better ways.

Like you know, real life.

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I’m Gen and I write about life, minimalism, and video games with my own flavor of humor and snark. If you like my stuff, you can follow me here @thenthgen