Three Of The Most Rejected People In My Country
My countrymen reject them every day. Every. Single. Day!
Eeeew!
That’s what she said.
Not to me though, but to someone who was making a move at her. She was young then, but now she has three kids and a caring partner.
It was the story she told me after sharing a similar meme with her. She confessed to me that she rejected someone in the same way. Once.
I’ve never known her to be cold.
When she remembers the sequence of events, she cringes. She wishes she would have laid it down slowly on the guy. But who knows?
I won’t divulge the identity of this close confidante, but the central lesson is:
Rejection can be hard.
She imagined how the guy took it. It must have stung. Unless he was drunk and didn’t give a hoot nor remembered what happened that night.
If you’ve never been rejected then you have not been sufficiently adventurous in life
Rejection is like a stripe on your skin, showing your scars in this tough world we live in. These scars get stronger by the day.
Now imagine if you’re one of these three people we’re to discuss today. I bet you would look at rejection differently.
I have taken time to study — sigh, I do have important things to do with my time, but anyway — these three groups. They are so commonly ignored, that after reading this, you’ll start to look at them differently.
Or not.
Regardless, I’ve learnt to admire their resilience.
Again, rejection can be hard. But these people are harder. Tougher. Stronger.
They look at rejection straight in the eye and like Jay Z, they are onto the next one. Here are the three groups most rejected in my country, Kenya.
Just before you board a public vehicle
There were times when I’d walk to the stage in a suit.
The typical pseudo Mr. Money Bags.
These guys thought I had a lot of money. They didn’t know how often I recycled my t-shirt and sparingly wore by grey blazer.
These are conductors. They get ignored by all types of people.
First, by ladies.
Most conductors are men. So they’d like to take the chance to speak to ladies even when it's clear they are not headed in that route. But who stops them?
Rejection doesn’t.
Some conductors take it to heart. I don’t write to honour those ones. They don’t take rejection like a man. But there are those who even make light of the situation.
Some are so smooth, they leave the lady smiling despite the rejection. Nevertheless, most ladies don’t like catcalling.
Conductors are here to make money. If you express disinterest or are headed elsewhere, they move on. Fast. Onto the next one.
They have mastered the art of accepting and redirecting their energies to make the most of it. Imagine if it were you. Would you take it in stride? Or would you handle it as normally as you do?
Even before you get to the stage
It’s me again, with my single, recycled full suit.
Still, they never learnt. I didn’t want to board their motorbikes.
I refer to the nduthi gang AKA those who ferry people through motorbikes. It feels like ferrying, how they move in waves from one lane to another through the sea of traffic.
If you have a car, you’d hate these guys. If you’re the one seated at the back, you’d wish they take the shortest route possible, regardless of the reactions they might get.
These people face a tonne of rejection.
Most of the people who pass them aren’t even interested in going anywhere. But still, they’d offer the ride.
You’d see one of them already grabbing the helmet, prepping their bike, or even maintaining eye contact until they lock. Then their eyebrows automatically rise and their hands signal.
But no, you just want to go to the nearby shop.
If we’re to flip the situation and imagine you asking them to just take you to the shop, a walking distance. And they declined. How would you handle that rejection?
Say you insisted that the journey is a short one and does not warrant payment, do you think they would take it to heart? Would you take the rejection to heart?
I bet you would.
But these guys have learnt the art of accepting what most people do to them— pass them without a care. In the same stride, they have learnt to accept rejection without caring as well.
The most rejected group of all
I remember the first time I went to high school.
My mother had cooked what later became a regular back-to-school dish. Chapati and fried beef. It was so good, it would last around three days from eating it sparingly.
I never wanted it to end. I’d take bits and pieces of beef every day and mix it with the school meal.
While my meal lost heat inside my bag, en route to school, these people continued to ask, repeat and even force themselves in front of my face:
Tropkos!
I’m a fan of tropical mint, but only when I want it. Not when someone is forcing it on you. Who likes being forced to do things?
Regardless, these guys are relentless.
They will see you from afar. You might even lock eyes, but quickly divert them. Sadly, once locked, they go in for the kill.
Tropkos!
I love it!
They are by far the largest group of people who face rejection with a warrior spirit. They already saw you don’t want to get their goods. But they still approach you.
It’s not like the conductors who move on to the next group of walking passers-by. It’s not like the motorbike riders who continue sitting on their bikes. It’s pure and relentless marketing.
Aggressive marketing.
These people hardly went to a marketing class, but they have the discipline of a dung beetle, bent on taking its hard-won pile back home. They are relentless.
Even if you’ve clearly rejected them, right on their faces, they’ll still repeat:
Tropkos!
You have to love them.
The lessons
If there are lessons to pick from these three groups it’s that rejection can be normal.
But imagine if they took it to heart. Would they make a dime?
Hell no!
I once read that insurance companies approach people who don’t reach out to them. Those who go seeking insurance are aware of their risks. These are the people to avoid.
Those who don’t are not aware. These are the primary targets of insurance companies. As sure as rain, they face a tonne of rejection, but do they stop?
Hell no!
These are the people who steer the insurance companies.
The conductor, the nduthi guy and our solopreneur selling mint and snacks are their own insurance companies. If they stop, they don’t make money.
Why not borrow a leaf from their resilient strategy?
It’s simple but needs a tough cheek.
Just look at rejection dead in the face and move close to it. Right until you can hear its breath to the point it’s almost awkward.
And when you’ve now got its attention, simply ask it:
Tropkos?
If it doesn’t budge, move onto the next one.
