Things I am usually Listening to — By the Girl Wearing Headphones that You are Trying to Talk to

I’m so chill.

The internet has been up in arms over men trying to talk to women wearing headphones. Well, I am that girl. A cool line to ask me is, “so what are you listening to?”

But maybe you don’t have enough confidence to ask me. I mean you are a man in 2016 in America, so you most likely do. But just in case, here are my answers:

-Korn, the Greatest Hits.What’s your favorite song? If it is Freak on a Leash, you are a damn poser.

- Youtube conspiracy videos. And I am going to get your thoughts on the Dyatlov Pass incident. I have so many of them.

-Some podcasts about Misandry. I’m very pro-Misandry.

- The screams of the innocent.

- Bunch of pre-recorded sneezes. It makes me giggle.

-James Urbaniak’s podcast. YOU THINK YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON, BUT YOU WILL NEVER BE HALF THE MAN JAMES URBANIAK IS.

-Whale noises. They help with my PTSD attacks. Want to hear all about why I am so sweaty?

-My own stand up that I recorded at the mic last night. I am really trying to get the wording on this joke about the patriarchy.

- Season 2 of Serial. No spoilers.

-It’s just silence. I was confused on the concept of “The Sound of Silence” By Simon and Garfunkel.

-It’s just silence. This is a fashion statement.

-It’s just silence. It drowns out the voices in my head saying to kill the next person I can seduce.

-Static. For some reason all electronics I touch do that. Why is my nose bleeding again?

- Now that’s What I call Music Volume 4

Do you still want to talk to me?

Like what you read? Give Rosa Escandon a round of applause.

From a quick cheer to a standing ovation, clap to show how much you enjoyed this story.