Hey, Doug, I appreciate the feedback. I first came across Jocko on Tim Ferriss’s podcast — a lot of respect for the guy, he is a warrior in every sense of the word. A friend of mine read his first book, Extreme Ownership, and strongly recommended it so I’m glad to hear he’s still putting high value content out there.
As for what I did to keep grinding, I could write an entire book on that, and in a sense I am, but to touch on it in this format I would say the pain I lived with for several years motivated me to try anything and everything to cope with it.
I started volunteering at an after-school tutor program for homeless families so I would have an obligation to meet every week where I had to force myself to be positive and get my shit together in order to effectively teach these kids and eventually supervise the other tutors.
I went to the gym a lot. I would spend hours almost every evening in the gym lifting weights and doing cardio until my body and mind were exhausted.
I kept trying new things that would force me to get out of my head or at least perceive my thoughts differently, such as improv (improvisational comedy) classes, meditation classes, yoga, etc…
I wrote, and I wrote a lot. Anytime I had thoughts that I couldn’t seem to let go of I would write them down in my phone and let them flow until nothing else came out. I would wake up in the middle of the night tortured by images I couldn’t seem to get rid of but as soon as I wrote them down until I couldn’t write anymore I would fall back asleep or the sun would come up and I’d start the day.
I saw a therapist off and on which gave me an outlet for all of my thoughts and feelings that I didn’t want to keep dumping on my friends who had been listening to the same story for months and eventually years.
I even saw a hypnotherapist at one point which opened my eyes to the power guided meditation can have on changing the way a person views his or her emotions and memories.
Eventually, the game changer was figuring out a way to make my pain seem insignificant, and that was to “dream so big” about my future and my potential that the pain then became a driving force in my life — then the only thing that mattered was my vision and the pursuit of it. I used the pain as fuel to develop that dream into something so grand that it may take longer than my entire life to accomplish, and in doing so the pain went from crippling me to motivating me, eventually transforming from hate to love.
Did that provide some clarity for what you were looking for?