Four Doors
The first blog post I wrote on here was about my need for… something else. Something to make me feel more complete. Something more than being a mother and a wife. Not because I see those roles as demeaning, but because I was something before I became those things and I felt that it was high time to find out what and add it back in to the mix of ‘me’!
Almost just the act of putting those original words down on paper (or blog), combined with the fresh air and salt water of my evening sailing (2nd blog post), made me see things more clearly.
So, I got off my arse and opened a few doors. 4 to be precise, and what I find behind them in making my blood pump a little bit faster through my veins.
- Sailing. After a beautiful evening out on the sparkling waters of the Solent with a very good friend I feel like I have got back on that horse. I have already booked in my next sail and feel a lot less nervous about it! I’m not quite the jet-setting bow girl of my twenties, but then some parts of our former selves have to go in order to make room for the new bits, and I am OK with that, as my new bits (my family) beat a private jet and a sailing adrenaline high any day. Well… most days!! A pootle on the river with friends is enough and I am so chuffed to be back in the game.
- Writing. I am not a runner but I run. I am not a singer but I sing to my little boy all the time. I am not a writer (‘no shit’ I hear you say ;-) ) but I write, and I enjoy it. I feel like my blogging, while slow and sporadic, is doing me good. It’s the modern teenage diary — a way to output my thoughts and feelings, a way to get feedback, and particularly in my instance a way to document a journey. It feels to good to be back into a bit of blogging.
- Work Satisfaction. Work is a tricky one. I moved to England from Scotland in 2006 and despite my Law degree, fell into a job in office management. It suited the pre-baby / husband me as it was marine industry and so it felt comfortable. Now, 10 years on it is too comfortable. I have realised in recent weeks that I need a bit of stress and adrenaline in order to feel alive. It is risk that makes me feel reward and I am taking no risks. So, while it is a slow start, I have decided to do some training in a different area — marketing. This will be on my own time and possibly at my own expense, but I find it interesting and who knows where this door could lead to further down the line.
- Art. I wanted to go to art school… but it seemed more sensible (to my parents anyway) to study law and apart from the occasional dabble, I never went back to the pencils and paper. Until now! The 4th door I have opened, with advice and council from my friends, is a little venture in custom artwork. I have set up a facebook page, and an instagram page and with every ‘like’ I get more excited about what it could become. I am addicted to checking it and have a little order book that is fulling up.
One thing that all these doors opening have in common are my friends and family. A conversation about blogging with a writer friend at a party, a sail with one of my oldest girl friends, a chat about creative output with a marketing-guru friend and then all those likers and sharers on Facebook and Instagram giving me confidence in myself.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.