Adopt a Bigot?
Change is hard. Stating the obvious. Yup.
Hearts and minds love to get fixed in one place don’t they. Once we’ve seen something a certain way our poor tiny mammal brain spends all its time looking for the things that reinforce and justify that point of view. We find our groove and we just want to dig in. But that doesn’t mean it’s impossible to switch tracks.
I think the size of the issue can often be the thing that prevents us from even taking the first step toward change. It’s all so big and scary and complex and we are absolutely certain our tiny little voice can’t make any difference. Either that or we just take a look at the height of the mountain that we have to climb and we think, naaaaaaah I’ll just stay put thanks. Way too much effort.
So here’s an idea, why don’t we make the issue smaller. Instead of mobilising as a group (although I’m up for that too) why don’t we mobilise as individuals.
My parents moved to France about five years ago to a tiny hamlet with a mere fifteen homes. They soon met their neighbours and discovered that one couple were also from the UK. This couple are in their seventies and see the world through a very culturally specific lens. They worked hard, built a business, employed people, raised a family and saved for their retirement in a welcoming warm climate. Not very political, but right-leaning and family focused. This leaning led them to a mindset formed by their community and steady diet of the Daily Mail and all that that suggests. The first time they met me and my partner was apparently the first time they’d ever met a gay person. The subject of my sexuality had already raised the heat slightly in conversations between them and my ever protective mother. But we got to know them and they got to know us and we’ve introduced them to our friends over the years. It was really something when one of them confessed that he’d never met someone gay before and they frequently tell my parents “oh we love the gays now” LOL.
My (rather long winded) point is I’m probably not going to change minds with my ideas and with my strongly worded tweets. How I’m going to change the world is with one person to person connection at a time. And it’s not going to happen overnight and it’s not going to happen with everyone I try to connect with. But all it takes it one. All it takes is each of us with an open enough mind to engage with someone else who doesn’t share our point of view. To put in the time and effort to listen to them properly and to keep on listening and sharing our view of the world.
It’s hardly a revolutionary idea. It’s an old fashioned one. But in this digital age of isolation where there is more and more noise, the only way to be heard will be with a singular connection. But, you know, 17 million singular connections…
#AdoptABigot anyone?
