Triggered As F*ck!

I’m triggered. I’m not an anxious person, I’m ususally pretty calm, but these days I find myself anxious, and angry, and triggered as hell. Are you triggered? Because I’m. F*cking. Triggered.

Every time a man walks up to me in the street or stands too close in the subway, and starts with “Can I talk to you for a minute.” my body tightens because the news is flooded with stories of men harassing, raping, or killing women for simply rejecting them. Killing them. And I prepare myself for the possibility that this simple interaction (which happens daily) will turn violent.

I’m triggered.

Anytime I see police talking to a black man on the street. I slow down my walk, just so everyone knows there’s another set of eyes watching. All the while worried about my own safety.


When I even think about driving. I’m terrified of being pulled over because now cops can commit murder or any type of abuse with no real consequence.

What’s happening in America right now feels like one big trigger. Every news segment should begin with a blacked out screen and “Trigger Warning” written in white letters. Like so:

Every Facebook post needs a warning too.

A man who said horrifyingly racist, misogynistic things, and has actually been accused of rape, was elected president. President! A man who continues to make millions of people feel unsafe on a daily basis, divide the nation, and put the entire country in danger…still remains President.

Men use guns to kill children and adults in the thousands each year, and nothing is being done about gun control, but almost 2 decades later and we’re still taking our shoes off and checking our water at the airport? Movie theaters feel unsafe. Concerts and other public gatherings, out of the question. Schools? How is it possible that going to school or church, is now potentially a life threatening activity? And nothing is being done about that.

Millions are triggered.

Weinstein and Cosby are two names on what is surely a long list of powerful men in the entertainment business who have been harassing, and raping, and abusing for decades. And people knew. And nothing was being done about that. And all these Me Toos on facebook got me screaming into my hairhat {wig}!! I’m pissed! But mostly I’m just sad.

Gentlemen: By now I’m sure you realize that sexual harassment or abuse has happened to literally every woman you know. Some form of it. Living in a city like New York, we encounter it almost daily. To the point where most of it is normalized and only particularly heinous encounters stick out.

We are triggered.

It’s ridiculous that we even spend time considering what women should do to NOT be harassed or assaulted, and almost no time figuring out how to stop men from doing the harassing and the assaulting. It’s not up to women to stop rape, just like it’s not up to black people to stop getting murdered by cops for no reason. Women don’t have a “rape problem” — rapists do, and a lot of those rapists are men.

So Men. With love I say to you: DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS FOR F*CK’S SAKE!!!

Cuz we a have a problem. It’s not the crime problem, it’s not the gun problem, and it is certainly not about immigrants and immigration. We have a man problem. There is a problem with men. Men have problems. WORLD WIDE. And those problems are causing ALL the other ones, and making it impossible for the rest of us to live in peace. Peace of mind, body or spirit. So I ask you Men: What are you really going to do about it? For the rest of us: How and when do we heal when it feels like everyday brings new trauma?

I’m honestly asking. I have no answers.

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