I have always been sexually curious. Nothing in my relatively white bread upbringing made me so, I just have been as long as I can remember. So it was in my early to mid teens, with hormones raging and curiosity rising, I found myself exploring with other boys. Like my friends, I was mesmerised by girls , but the awkwardness, the mystery, the early adolescence, it was hard enough talking to one, let alone… As a result, one day we just found ourselves exploring one another in lieu of another option.
So it was through a group of close friends that I began to learn about what these parts of mine could do, what other guys looked like and what sort of emotional feelings came associated with sexual activity. Looking back at those times, I am grateful that they happened, they liberated me from the guilt often associated with sexuality when you’re young and made me realise that sexuality is simply a part of ‘being human’. We all knew what we were doing wasn’t ‘accepted’, yet we were all more than happy to use the times we got together, to explore. Certainly, when that time passed and I found myself chasing the company of girls, I had very little in the way of inhibition.
What we did was pretty tame. Showing, touching, exploring. But the one thing we tried that was ‘daring’, was going down on one another. I am not sure how or why it happened but there seemed to be a shared curiosity as to what it felt like, and that it felt good to receive only increased the drive to want to explore it further; though we always avoided the point of cumming.
And I’ll be honest, I did not mind it! If I compare it to going down on a woman I’d say that, in a hetro encounter, women get the easier deal!
But these encounters taught me valuable lessons I was to carry over to my relationships years later. When it came to sexual encounters, I learnt trust and communication are the two key factors that will make or break them. As friends, we trusted one another and knew how to communicate. That meant, in the case of giving head, we felt comfortable the receiver would not do something stupid, like be forceful or cum in the giver’s mouth, and that in turn created a bubble of comfort that allowed one to openly communicate what worked; and in this atmosphere, everyone was relaxed and enjoyed themselves.
Years later when my first girlfriend ’S’ she said she wanted to go down on me, there was no blind rush. Through trust, communication, and an understanding of what she might be feeling, we worked our way through that first time and set the tone for our sex life together; that afternoon probably played a large part as to why sex was so natural and ‘easy’ for us.
And this outlook and approach is something that I have taken into all my relationships, which have all had healthy sex lives.
So it was, through giving head to guys, that I learnt how to have sexual respect for women. While probably not for everyone, even now I can’t think of a better way to have learnt such important lessons.
I’m a guy, writing about….sex (I know, right?), and the travel’s of life.
