Relaxation is who you are
Tension is who you want to be.
I think about the idea of what it means to be a whole person. There’s people’s perception of you based on isolated incidents and experiences together, then there is your own unfiltered perception of your life as it is.
The ending of “Into the Wild” concludes with the poignant moment when the lone traveler realizes that “Happiness is only real when shared.” Although to me, some of the strongest emotions I’ve experienced could not have been shared with anyone. To attempt to describe these emotions in speech or writing would most definitely diminish their effect — What accompanied my fondest memories were surges of warmth, or twinges in my chest that made breathing difficult, or unexpected goosebumps, or undercurrents of moods that were unidentifiable, like shades of colors or shifting musical chords. There’s miles of iceberg beneath the surface of our personas, pools of energy that never flow to reach others. The reservoirs of tension build and build.
Then there’s rare moments when our tumultuous inner worlds and rich outer realities collide. When the linear planes by chance intersect between two people to form a line along which all their messy feelings and thoughts and perceptions travel. Reluctantly, you release the tension within and relax into shy acknowledgment: Oh, you’re here too. You understand, you see me. I’m not alone.