5 toxic moves that we mistake for love
1. Allowing them to constantly dump their problems on you without accepting responsibility or even attempting to change.
Perhaps we find purpose in being needed. We find meaning in playing the role of therapist, counsellor and hero. The one who is always available to help save others from themselves. And yet these very people refuse to take responsibility for their own lives or even act on the advice you give them.
I can pinpoint several relationships in my life which were built on this model and yet by the end of it, I was left frustrated and disheartened. Some people cannot be fixed and don’t even want to be fixed. They simply enjoy using others as a crutch for their self-inflicted wounds.
2. Constantly betraying yourself to please them
As a recovering people pleaser, I speak from experience when I say that boundaries are necessary in every relationship. It may seem harmless at first to change your opinions to please others or in order to be liked and accepted. But when analysed, you recognise that self-betrayal is usually at the root cause of low self-esteem, worth and lack of confidence. To silently endure this relentless vicious cycle will leave you feeling violated and disconnected even…
