Three keys to commitment and consistency.

Tiffany Sanya
Sep 6, 2018 · 4 min read

Tales of a recovering drifter …

Tiffany Sanya- Venice 2018

Part 1

I am currently reading ‘Outwitting the devil’ by Napoleon Hill in which he describes the characteristics of a typical drifter.
These includes — lack of major purpose in life, beginning many things but completing nothing, never reaching decisions on anything and lacking in enthusiasm and initiative to begin anything he or she is not forced to undertake.

I recognise my previous self in most if not all of these. It’s not as if I didn't desire more from life, my actions just did not line up accordingly.
And flakiness was apparent in all areas of my life. From career to dating, I’d metaphorically sign up then not show up. Within a period of six months I fluctuated between pursuing a career in management consulting, becoming a life coach, and going back to University to study a Masters so I could go into regulatory banking.

My dating style was similar. Meet someone interesting, go on a couple of dates then become plagued by FOMO. I start to think what else am I missing out on out there?

Whilst I clearly struggled to commit to any definite plan for my life, there was also other key issues beneath the surface that I was ignoring. Fear being a key one. I was afraid of getting it wrong and equally as afraid of being criticised for making foolish decisions. Procrastination was also lurking around me, many times I would discover a ‘good idea’, but promise to start tomorrow. Or the day after that, or the next month. Actually maybe next year once I am ready.

Now I look back on the journey embarked on just over three years ago to live more intentionally, I can pinpoint what changed.

Repetition
There is power in good systems and habits repeated time and time again. For example, we must not fool ourselves into believing that simply having a morning ritual will lead to success. If the rest of the day is in disarray then all is lost. However to create a personal system fit for your productivity level and follow through with it consistently can be beneficial.

I went from getting up in the morning and just doing whatever seemed fit to making time for activities which set me up to have a clear mind and change how I perceived myself.
It started with running 3 miles daily, regardless of whether it’s cold or I’m sad, happy or don’t even feel like it. This caused a major shift in my identity as I started to see myself in new light as one who follows through and also built up my self-respect and confidence. To go beyond what is ordinary is not necessarily a matter of what others notice and commend you for.

Looking in the mirror, I saw the sort of person ..who finishes what they set out to do..follows through even when it is uncomfortable..who is not led by their emotions.

Reassess your perception of choices
I have come to accept that it’s not what you do but how you do it that matters. I stalled for so long in my life because I was afraid of pursuing the wrong career or missing out on a better love. It took some adjustments to appreciate that the process of making a decision is in itself a form of empowerment. To not make a choice or spend too long pondering is the quickest way to relinquish your capacity to circumstances or other people.

Now I look back and think that even if I had ended up working on a market stall, I would have infused such enthusiasm to serve my customers that it would have had to become successful.
We hold back because we are constantly fed the idea of finding your passion or what sets your heart on fire. What we fail to notice is that it is not always about us but a case of finding what adds value to others and what they are willing to pay you for. Sure, you are allowed to enjoy what you do but don’t fool yourself into expecting to love all aspects of it.

Master your Fears
Whether we admit it or not, fear is often an underlying factor. It has the potential to cripple the ability to take definite action even when we don’t realise it. Something Napoleon discusses in detail in ‘Think and grow rich’. The basic ones include fear of criticisms, poverty, death, ill-health, loss of love and old age.
I can admit that I have been troubled with them all at some stage.
But what causes me to move forward despite my fears is the desire to make something of my life. When you have hung out with stagnation, hopelessness, and helplessness, and survived, there comes a time when even your fears are not enough to keep you in your comfort zone.
Fear subsides over time as you consistently put yourself out there through actions.

Will be continued…

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Tiffany Sanya

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Committed to living intentionally. Writing to make sense of it all. Now on Youtube-https://youtu.be/RnVpNG4KNaA

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