Okay! I’ll start thinking about it..
Tessa
1

Very well described. I loved what Alexainie said to me about an artistic endeavor always being different in one’s mind before pen meets paper. I’d go off on hermeneutics and the subject/object dichotomy framework and Wittgenstein’s idea that language creates reality on a tangent about how that is because the reality we (partially) create then exists in a feedback loop in the process of creation which in turn effects and changes us and leads to a sort of infinite series with fractal repetition like some hippie Zen op-art MC Escher drawing infinitely receding into itself.

But she summed it up beautifully.

You had an idea of creating a community, then you went and done did it (to culturally appropriate B.E.V.) but it sounds like it turned out slightly differently than you intended. So now you have another idea forming about how you’d maybe sorta kinda like to approach this, you have it, it seems to me, crystalized but sound a lil wary? I might be reading too much into it, I do that, sorry. I am forever presumptuous, character trait.

I like the idea of reading a sort of informal internal dialogue and then, like, chiming in. I love the way you put that. Sometimes, you’re right, that puts into words exactly what I feel like (part of) the Medium experience is for me. I love the way you phrased that.

Yes. I would like that. I have so little luck with planning an idea here and then like creating that reality, though. But. But I really am enjoying writing. So, there’s that.

I have two more submissions of Hertics, working on a fourth. I am hesitant to submit them though because I hate to feel like a bother. Or I don’t know, a ball hog, that’s my M.O. in sports but I honestly love the assist. I am always wary of being labeled selfish, so I think sometimes I might go out of my way not to appear that way? And then I overshare, in the sense of unburdening or unloading myself too much on one person. I have baggage! So. So I become wary of oversharing and do not want to dominate, don’t even want the appearance of trying to dominate, a conversation or a discussion or a thread.

If that makes any sense?

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