The two pictures above were taken on the same day, about 10 hours apart.
The image on the left shows the optimism I’m starting to feel more often, a sense of actual wellness that sometimes comes after a shower and getting dressed, a feeling fueled by the thought that I may finally be headed toward what I’m starting to call “a full good day.”
But the pic on the right shows how I feel most of the time, usually by late afternoon and some days within just a few hours of that morning hope.
The fever comes back. My breathing…
I have been sick with the symptoms of COVID-19 since March 11, 2020. Yet as far as I know, I’m not one of the red numbers you see on the news. I don’t know if I’m among the cases making my tiny township, just outside of Pittsburgh, a little darker blue by the day.
I’m in a grey area in between, one of thousands in this same boat, and it seems there are two main reasons why we’re here:
As we sit perched on the edge of impending doom, a doom which this time feels more real, as if we can see the wave approaching, growing wider, taller, destroying trees and barns as it swells, rolling over our memories, taking our loved ones, even that old Honda — while we stand and hold each other’s hands, locking fingers and knowing it is over, over for real this time, we had a good run, me and you — we will remember. …
I woke up this morning and cried.
I cried because it was going to be a long day. I cried because I hoped it’d be the day we’d been working for.
I cried because it was actually November 8, 2016, the day that’d seemed so far away, for so long.
My kids get out of bed around 6:30 am. Most mornings, they watch TV. I’m a single mom, and I don’t care that they’re watching TV (and probably wouldn’t care if I weren’t a single mom). Our current binge-favorites (and therefore morning staples) are Malcolm in the Middle and Arrested…
Depression isn’t an overwhelming sadness.
It’s an overwhelming nothingness.
I just read the news about Cheryl Wu’s death. A tweet with “fuck cancer” caught my eye at first. Yes, I’d thought. Fuck cancer.
Another young, talented person taken by this fucking disease? I’d thought.
It was a different disease.
Cheryl took her own life.
I didn’t know Cheryl, but I know some of her friends and coworkers. And I know that depression and anxiety and self-doubt and admitting to all of these are a systematic problem in our industry, and our world.
I know because I’ve been there.
It’s time once again to celebrate the winter holiday of your choice! While it’s easy to head out to the nearest one-stop-store to look for last-minute gifts, I’m here to tell you not to.
Don’t give any more of your money to some giant-ass corporation. Give your money to support talented local artists who create awesome things.
Here’s my favorites this year. Shop local. Stay cool.
I met Kim Fox of Worker Bird at the In Bed by Ten dance party (which you should totally go to, by the way). That night, I knew she was cool. When I…
We live in a society that doesn’t understand mental health.
We also live in a society that doesn’t fully understand physical health and the myriad factors that can influence it.
In the fall of 2014, I experienced nearly three months of constant abdominal pain and debilitating nausea. The causes of these symptoms have never been determined.
Here’s how it went down.
Warning: The following article contains frank descriptions of medical procedures, bodily functions, and raw emotion.
September 25: Baylor St. Luke’s Medical Center, Houston, TX
In late September of 2014, while traveling for work in Houston, I started to get sick…
Around 9:30 am EST on November 3, 2015, thousands of Twitter users noticed a big change in the application’s desktop browser interface:
Suddenly, our stars were hearts.
And our “favorites” were “likes.”
Clicking the little heart where the star used to be produced a tiny animated explosion, and a giant, also quite animated, explosion of opinion on Twitter.
Tweets about the change flooded my timeline — everything from questioning the purpose of the change (Instagram uses hearts; Facebook uses “Likes,” Twitter now has a “heart-like”), the psychology of the action (“Favoriting”…
In Amy Schumer’s new HBO special, she has a bit near the beginning about self image. (Ok, a lot of her stuff is about self image.)
She’s all, “Every woman has this suspicion: Maybe I’m…secretly…gorgeous.”
I laughed out loud at this, not because Amy’s not totally gorgeous (she totally is) but because I’ve…secretly…thought the same thing.
When Canada’s election concluded on Monday night, I googled Justin Trudeau and went on an unapologetic Twitter swoon-storm about how fucking cute he is. After this, I heard that he used to be a snowboard instructor at Whistler and was all, “naturally!”
Mopping the kitchen floor.
Writing that contract because you needed it yesterday.
Just one more cupcake?
Doing my timesheet.
Covering the other out-of-scope work with the work YOU thought would be out-of-scope.
Having out-of-scope conversations at all.
That first (second) shot of Jameson.
Driving the turnpike.
Paying $38 for school pictures, just because I “need” the 8x10.
Every. Single. PTA. Fundraiser.
Flushing the downstairs toilet by hand, and having to wash my hand afterwards.
Taking my kids to see Star Wars Episode VII on opening day, because I saw Episode I in the theatre at midnight, and the experience sucked…
UX evangelist, agile advocate, crafter, bassist, ENFP.