9 Tips for Fireproofing your Marriage

Marriage is the union between husband and wife. The two become one as they commit to merge their paths together. One of my favorite quotes on topic is “marriage is, two people walking side by side toward a common goal” Oh the beauty of a singular passion that unites two people! And so, first and formost when we have our sights locked on Jesus, than we can not only survive in our marriage but thrive.
The following are 9 simple tips that have blessed our marriage and hope will do that same for you.
- Love Them Above Yourself.
Jesus said; “I have not come to be served, but to serve and give myself as a ransom for many”
Love takes action, it cannot be still. It speaks works of affection, hugs, helps clean the dishes, gives massages, talks, listens, speaks truth, and does so with the good of your spouse in mind. Namely their faithfulness towards God.
2. Implement Date Night.
The mistake couples make upon returning from their honeymoon is stop dating. Just because you got married, doesn’t certify you as a professional on knowing your spouse. In order to upkeep your relationship you must continue getting to know one another, have fun together, and laugh. Therefore, don’t be afraid to spend money on maintaining this friendship by, taking lots of pictures, going out, and enjoy activities your spouse enjoys. Once a week, find a babysitter, take time away from work, and even ministry. For those in ministry, a healthy church is made up of healthy families and a happy life is found within thriving relationships.
“A healthy church is made up of healthy families”
3. Commit to be Committed
There is no excuse for cheating on your spouse and cheating doesn’t imply having sex with another person. Flirting with others, fantasizing about that women while your falling asleep, putting yourself in situations where you expose yourself to pornography will all strain the relationship. Commit to your spouse, by thinking about them, why you love them, how you would like to develop your relationship with them. Than take actions that promote commitment. When dealing with a conflict, remember your commitment to one another and do not let the sun set on your anger.
“The grass isn’t always greener on the other side, it’s greener where you water it”
4. Stand up for your spouse
Don’t gossip about your spouse, complain to your friends and family about them. Look to resolve issues within your relationship. There is no need to sit with your friends and discuss sex issues, lack of love for your spouse for the sake of belittling them or gaining pity. They will only encourage the failing of your marriage. yet if there is abuse, mistreatment, and unresolved issues please do get trusted friends and pastors involved. Those who truly have your best in mind.
5. Become Vulnerable
A strong relationship is built on honestly and trust. Sharing your joys, fears, and struggles will bind you together. You must create an atmosphere in which they feel free to share their heart with you. This is accomplished by your significant other knowing you will listen to them, not judge them, continue to love, and be willing to help them. They must trust you will keep their information to yourself, and be willing to help them. And last be willing to open up yourself and share your heart. Men talk, its liberating.
6. Be Helpful
The myth that only women take care of the home and men maintain the car is simply foolish. Men, if you come home from work, expect a hot meal, clean home, and massage than you are an fool. Your an even greater idiot if you dispise your wife because she fails to do so. Although it is important to understand roles assigned by God as men leading their families, it does not imply men are superior. We must serve one another and be helpful to one another. Men be willing to clean the dishes and vacuum. Men, take the time to cook for your wife. Be romantic and create a candle light dinner for crying out loud! In fact, when you come home from work give her a break and play with the kids. Not only does she need a break but your kids need their daddy.
7. Fight with a Kiss
My siblings and I would get into fights often, our father would discipline us and force us to hug afterward. It was tough giving your brother a hug after getting into a fight, yet it really helped to remind us, we are family.
You will disagree, get upset, and feel hurt at times yet it is important to act rather than react to trouble. It is vital we not walk away from an argument. Don’t stomp and slam the door in protest. Keep your voice down, and your emotions in check as you seek to resolve the issue. There is no need to yell and belittle your spouse, in fact you are failing to inform your spouse of your pain by doing so. Communication must be clear, limit the emotional outbreak. Remember your goal is to fix the issue, if what you are doing creates additional tension than you are doing something wrong therefore take the time to reevaluate your approach to troubleshooting your marriage. Sometimes it helps to simply break in and breath out a prayer.
“hug after getting into a fight, yet it really helped to remind us, we are family”
8. Fan the Romance
Don’t settle for a dull marriage in which you simply try to get by. Activate romance by being romantic. Take the time to plan a surprise, possibly a weekend getaway, write a love note, have flowers delivered, or write a poem professing your love. Do the little things that tell your spouse “Hey, you special to me, and I love you like crazy”
9. Thrive Together
Don’t settle for doing life alone, marriages unites and bonds two into one. Therefore, do life together, read, pray, and plan life together. Everything you do impacts your family, so do good. If one of you are struggling, the other will also. Be yoked in teamwork. Cry together and laugh together. Allow no one and no thing to separate and stand between the two of you. And in the framework of the unity of your family, you will find joy upon joy.
Now go give your spouse a hug and tell them you love them deeply and plan that date.
