How Your Toilet Paper Roll Has Been There For Me
We all have those shitty moments when something insignificant starts meaning a lot to us. For me, it was the toilet paper roll my best friend, N, had decided on ditching when we were headed home from a trip.
I am a sucker for all things. I will personify them to the extent that I cannot leave it all alone there. Unashamedly, I had shoved it into my backpack.
I never thought the pink toilet paper and I would embark on such an intense journey, but it was so important that I record it for all to read and know.
We made memories, and here are the few important ones.
- Cried and wiped my tears with it.
I am a cry-baby, so you must understand how often this came to use for me.
- Wiped paint with it.
Considering how much of a better hand-letter-er I am than N, I tried thinking I’m a better painter as well. Alas, it only led to my study table being ruined and nothing else. Before my mom realized what I was up to, the roll came to my rescue, wiping away the worst bits of paint, dry or wet.
- Wiped food off the floor before parents showed up.
The worst bit about having food is having it at the dinner table. There have been times when I have avoided that rule and had lunch in my room, with sauce and gravy of all kinds staining the floor. It was not permanent, though, because there it was — the toilet paper. It was like a superhero. I should’ve named it something.
- Wiping the toilet seat with it.
My sister has a disgusting habit of never pulling the toilet seat up. She leaves it down, with the water from her shower sitting there, waiting for my bum to get drenched and ruin my day. There have been so many times that I have run out of the bathroom in anger, only for the toilet paper to end up in my hands to wipe the seat dry before using it.
- When I had a cold.
I wiped my nose with it. Then I hurt my nose because the material of the toilet paper was so rough.
- Cleaned my desk.
People show up at my place. It is hard to run and find the right cloth for dusting, so the toilet paper has always been my go-to hero for wiping away dust. Did you know that maximum portion of the dust we see is basically our skin cells?
- When I’d given up.
There have been times when the colds used to get so bad that I used to end up shoving a rolled up toilet paper up my nose and just sit there, waiting for the end of it all.
- Cleaned my laptop.
My laptop is my baby, and has been so since 2013. The toilet paper has been its buddy when the baby dirtied itself up.
- Periods. Period.
The material is so rough and hard that I literally took notes on it at times. Believe me.
- Sniffed it.
Don’t judge me.
It had gotten wet numerous times, but it had never let me down. After a few hours of drying in the sun, it always used to be ready to be used like those trash cans that say ‘Use Me’.
- In class.
It has managed to mean so much to me that I had lost concentration in class because of writing down ideas for this article.
- Embarrassing my best friend on Social Media.
The missing cardboard roll in the middle of it. Embarrassing. Mysterious. Maybe.
The toilet paper has been important enough for me to ask N for another roll on the next trip. It gave me hope that I shall have something as important as this Pink Hero has been to me.
I wrote a freakin’ article on it. It motivated me to write. That’s it, man. That’s it.
Best. Toilet Paper. Ever.
Biggest thanks goes to N for being heartless and almost throwing the toilet paper away.