Respect is a Dangerous Word
And why is should not be earned.
Folks, we have officially changed the meaning of respect. More often than not, our usage of a word that by definition means “to admire, as a result of abilities, qualities, or achievements” is delivered as a demand, with a sense of obligation, selfishness, and even fear. Proliferated by a reductive meme culture that strips words of meaning, respect is no longer admiration, but a twisted expectation motivated by the insecure belief that people are, by default, undeserving until they prove themselves worthy.
And it feels bad, man.
If you’d like a little background noise to make this depressing “think piece” more palatable, here’s the Aretha jam you’re already thinking of.
♪ R-E-S-P-E-C-ME ♪
To start, let’s just look at the word itself. To respect is to admire. Someone did something good (probably a bunch of times) so we collectively give her a big ol’ thumbs up. And while that usage does still happen, it seems more common to hear “respect” in a watered-down, right-of-passage context. It’s not about honoring. It’s a baseline. It is the bare minimum a person must do to be considered for approval.
“Show some respect!”
“Man, no one respects me.”
