Addiction

6:00am Wake up. Time to get ready to go to what can only be described as the modern incarnation of the British workhouse. Shower. Brush teeth. Pack lunch.

6:45am Leave the house. Queue music for the hour commute.

7:50am First hit of the day. I take it slowly, and I feel the comforting warmth coursing through me. I wouldn’t say the feeling is happy just yet, but I’d be much worse off without it. I am now functional.

8:00am Almost ready to face the day. Grab a quick bite of a leftover sandwich I had left the previous morning. It’s not as good cold, but I don’t have time to waste, have to use the time I have just earned myself to be productive. Time to get to work.

10:30am The cravings start to kick in. Starting to feel tired, a bit restless. Look at the clock, typically hit two comes around 11:00am. Must stall myself until then. Focus, focus, focus.

11:00am Second hit of the day. I run across the building to the empty kitchen. No one’s here, lunch isn’t for another hour and a half, I can satisfy my craving. The comforting warmth washes over me again, and I feel like life is slowly returning Happiness and productivity continue for a while.

12:30pm Lunch time. Leftover spaghetti from last night’s dinner with the girls. Maybe I should message them to plan something tonight. The thought is fleeting, and I end up chatting with co-workers over the day’s news.

1:30pm Still good from 11:00am. I think I can make it for a bit longer. Drowsy at the moment, but that will pass… soon… I hope.

3:00pm Third hit of the day. Scratch that I thought. I almost made it to the end, but, may as well. I need it to get home anyways.

4:00pm Leave the office. Queue music for the drive home. Lately I’ve been getting into more intricate podcasts and stories; I can never focus enough in the mornings, but in the afternoons I’m okay.

5:00pm Fall on the couch. I don’t like to take stuff in the evening. It throws off the schedule and makes it nearly impossible to sleep at night.

6:00pm Call Michael — maybe we can do something tonight. Go to a bar? Play pool? Something to get through the rest of the day. He doesn’t answer

6:30pm I give up on friends and decide to make dinner. TV and sandwiches it is.

7:00pm My eyes glaze over as I spend hours on nothingness — scrolling the internet for information of any kind. New videos, posts, pictures, gifs, comments.

11:00pm Where did the time go? Pack lunch for tomorrow.

11:13pm Bed time. Glasses off. Brush teeth. Good night.

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