A Tongue-in-cheek Medium Lifehack Review
Henry Wismayer
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Looking for signs by © Death To Stock

Signs of the Apocalypse

(Ok, maybe not the end — but signs that, sure as shit, we’re in trouble)

This is my list. Make your own list if you’re a hater…

  1. Tech Bros are in charge of society and dictate the values we should aspire to, ensuring compliance by trolling the (fill in your own expletives here) out of anyone who suggests otherwise.
  2. The front page of the New York Times is a listicle 4 out of 7 days a week. Just a listicle, nothing else — because we are too busy to read actual writing.
  3. Donald Trump becomes president, not because I don’t like Trump — he’s a really funny guy sometimes, but because he makes it seem OK to be homophobic, xenophobic, racist, scared, angry, and generally mean to everyone who either disagrees with you or doesn’t look like you or both.
  4. Teachers and medical professionals get paid as much as 30% LESS than unskilled manual labour. Oh wait, that is actually a thing. Kudos to unskilled labour — we need that! But, we also need people learning, because robots and indentured servitude.
  5. We decide to spend more on prisons and warfare than education and health. Err, again, I might be late in making this list.
  6. Voting is a thing of the past. We start electing officials by how many likes or wows they get on Facebook.
  7. Zombies are actually roaming the streets. I think I’m safe in saying this is an actual sign of the apocalypse.
  8. England wins the World Cup. Seems awesome, but it suggests something is very wrong with the rest of football, even more wrong than rampant corruption.
  9. We notice there are two suns in the sky. That shit would be scary.
  10. Henry Wismayer stops writing awesome articles that provide a glimpse of the world we don’t often hear about. His publishers tell him it’s all about the clicks. We hear a big sucking sound across the interwebs where empathy and curiosity used to reside.

Say it ain’t isn’t so Henry. Please tell me you had a ghost writer for this fun piece of Mediumland style writing. I scrolled down, thinking it was another teaser to get people to read your remarkable writing.

It wasn’t, eek!

Perhaps you are executing on some secret tech strategy that I’m too stupid to see. Perhaps you are just taking a break from the difficult work of climbing volcanos while in danger of being shot by someone hiding in the jungle. That’s cool.

I’m just shouting out loud that I love your writing, not listicles. I’m also a conundrum, that’s why I made the list above! But, I’m just one random old white dude in the North of England…so maybe, on second thought, I need to get with the programme. Do I need to chill?

I hope so, because apocalypse.

Peace.