Words matter.
Respect and fairness are important. I’m in no position to say which words resonate with you, but I suspect love — as I’ve laid it out here, would encompass your words, respect and fairness.
Love is an accessible word. It is open.
I think respect and fairness are instructive words. They place judgement upon the recipient. I don’t think they create an atmosphere for dialogue. Case in point: Kaepernick. Ironically, he is being told to be respectful. He is being instructed and the word carries the intention.
He’s not being told to love the troops. Why the flag is all about the troops in a democracy, I’ll never understand. If I use the language of respect and fairness to those who would post the picture I’ve shared, I’m pretty sure those people will immediately put their shields up and counter with Kaepernick (no respect), Social programmes (not fair). We will be in a standoff.
Love is aspirational and opens a door to dialogue. We‘re struggling to even have a diaologue about racism in the USA, much less a chance of vanquishing it. This crazy picture from a Facebook post is all about denying racism even exists and it’s aiming to shut down any dialogue.
I’m sure much wrong has been done in the name of love, especially if you consider love for a god to be at the centre of nearly every global conflict for a millennium. Unfortunately, the foot soldiers of that kind of love were respect and fairness for a particular side.
And so it goes…
Respect and fairness are part of love and are extremely helpful words. They draw healthy boundaries for love. This is especially true when someone needs to be instructed to act in a way that ensures they comply with reason when there are consequences for noncompliance: domestic abusers come to mind. I wouldn’t tell an audience of abusers to just love their victims — they are using love as a weapon.
When I’m talking to an audience that is, in the main, unwittingly trapped inside a system that maintains both their privilege and racism in subtle and insidious ways, I’m looking for language that opens doors of discovery and connects me to that audience at a human level. In my experience, instructive words are not great connectors.
In the end, we’re both fighting for the same thing with slightly different thinking about the approach. These are just my ideas for change in the world. They don’t exclude your ideas — they very much include them.
Peace.
I’m happy to keep talking about this, especially if you think my approach may be damaging or otherwise unhelpful. And to broaden the discussion, perhaps other people will join in on this topic…some folks that come to mind include alto, Clay Rivers, Thaddeus Howze, Ezinne Ukoha, and Jules .
