Still The Same

I should be in bed, but I’m not. I had a rehearsal tonight and, like with all good rehearsals, I’m still buzzing a good bit now that I’m home. It always takes me a while to “come down” after a long practice with good players.

When you first start writing songs (specifically worship songs,) it’s a pretty scary prospect. Eventually, you get brave enough to try one of the songs with other musicians in front of other people. And regardless of how the song goes over, you get this kick at some point. Maybe it’s while you’re leading it, maybe it’s after the set is over — but there’s a moment when you think, “Oh. I’m making this.”

It’s this surreal thing where your mind is suddenly fascinated by the fact that all the music you’re hearing is being made by you and the band. No soundtrack playing, no loops, no recorded music running alongside you. Just you and the band, playing a song you wrote that (hopefully) people are singing, too.

And the thing is…it never goes away.

After years of writing and recording and leading and rehearsing and church service after church service, I still get that kick. Sometimes it’s quiet; other times is almost overpowering. But it’s that same humbling, grateful feeling. It’s almost overpowering, to be honest.

I had that again tonight. I don’t know that my songs stand up to the other tunes we played, but to be honest, that doesn’t really matter to me. What matters is that God’s been more than kind. He’s given me something I can use to serve the church and He’s blessed me far beyond what I could ever deserve.

The joy of original music written to the glory of God is still the same today.