Chester Bennington gave me a song
A tribute to a man who introduced me to Rock and condolence to Linkin Park
Numb was one of the reigning songs while I was in high school and it was my introduction to rock.

Every radio station played this particular song and sooner than later, I had the full lyrics in my head
I was at a point in my life where nothing was working well for me. I was failing at school and in life.
I’m tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
Don’t know what you’re expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
I was struggling to be who my parents wanted me to be, they thought I wasn’t making use of all I had. It was a tough period of my life and the lyrics above provided succor (well, maybe so I thought)
I would always resolve to this part of the song quoted above, perhaps one of them felt that same way.
With the passing of time, I started confessing that I was numb without even knowing it. I was at the point where I didn’t even know who I was anymore.
Once it got to the chorus, I would jump with all my strength and might because that was a climax for me.
This was a battle between who I was trying to be and who I really wanted to be hence the scream :
I’ve become so numb, I can’t feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
I’m becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Depression isn’t a bus stop but a path and a journey that people travel through. Sadly, many do not accept until they arrive at a dead end.
Without a doubt, this numbness followed me till I found a solution and that was in acceptance to speak up.
I concluded this way :
And I know
I may end up failing too.
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you.
In speaking up, I was able to release myself from the battle of finding myself versus accepting who people thought I should be.
I found that I am more than what they wanted me to do. It was time to break barriers and limits. In order not to fail, I had to take a step and this step was a battle over depression.
I may not have known Chester as a kid but this song has been phenomenal

I sympathize with Linkin Park on the demise of Chester as they have truly shown to be a team all through the years he battled several illnesses and injuries. You have in times past cancelled tours yet he has left you all but I challenge you to check your own health and own up to what is felt inside.
It is sad that Chester has left us as the rest keep leaving but it much more teaches that those who reach us deeply the most are often far from our help.
I encourage everyone to seek help whenever you feel unhealthy within you.
If you’re going through stuff you need to share, you can call the following, depending where you are:
- NIGERIA: Suicide Prevention Initiative on +2348062106493 or Mentally Aware Nigeria +2348060101157 or +2347067670371
- UK: samaritans.org. Hotline: +44 (0) 8457 90 90 90 (UK) or 1850 60 90 90 (ROI). E-mail Helpline: jo@samaritans.org
P.S. I also loved the Hybrid Theory and I still listened to it years back when I was down emotionally.
