NEW YEAR’S Ls- You can only love.

When I say Ls, I mean lessons.

January arrived. And departed just as slowly. But, it did leave me with lessons- lessons I would not forget in a hurry.

1. YOU CAN ONLY LOVE

Laughs in sage wisdom.

January taught me, ‘You can only love a person, but you cannot mandate their reciprocation.’ I might be wrong, of course but bear in mind that is my experience you’re reading here. Mine.

I saw how the love I offered was received. Sometimes, it was quickly forgotten. At other times, it wasn’t even recognized. You know how they say that you can love someone so intensely and they wouldn’t even perceive it or feel loved? Yes, that was my dilemma.

Perhaps, it wasn’t because those I loved didn’t love me in return. Maybe, they couldn’t fully embrace my love because I didn’t speak it in the language that THEY knew.

2. “THAT’S JUST HOW LIFE IS”

“Why must I bring something to the table? What happened to loving people as they were?”, I asked a friend over the phone. I was sad.

I didn’t understand why all (or maybe, many) relationships no longer seemed to stem from love. Why did I have to constantly outdo other people in a person’s life just to hear them say the words “I love you”?

While I’m not one for complacent love (no, no) and wouldn’t mind standing with you between the heavens and the earth- why’s our concept of love flawed? Why this insistence on ‘show me or prove it’ before ‘I choose you’?

“Well, that’s just how life is. Only Jesus loves without conditions, Tolu. Accept it,” my friend replied.

January taught me that certain feelings, no matter how legitimate, would never cause the world to change for you.

3. SOMETIMES, YOU JUST OVERTHINK THINGS.

Those feelings are not valid. Snap out of it.