Light-Gray Old Navy Cargo Shorts: Wow, I haven’t thought about this day in a long time. This is from the celebration along the River Walk after Tim’s first title. Tim and I actually had a huge argument right before this. Well, really it was just me screaming at him. Which is pretty out of character for me. Over where to put his cell phone. I saw what he was going to do, and I was like, “Dude, I’m fucking cargo shorts. CARGO SHORTS. How are you gonna wear me, then not put your phone in one of my 25 pockets, bro?” And Tim just kinda rolled his eyes, you know how he does, and, pop, clipped that Nokia 8110 right to my waistband. You know, he got that phone because it’s the one Neo uses in The Matrix. [Sighs.] Sorry, I still get upset about this. You know, like, my whole purpose on this planet is I have a million pockets. That’s why I was made. Whatever. Couple of months later, I got stained while he was playing paintball and that’s the last time he wore me.