Eventually, there came a moment when I realized that studying all these time-management hacks and calendar systems and multistep strategies was only stalling me from the real work of actually getting things done. I already knew the most powerful productivity technique. It was just a matter of using it.
…emselves, a problem still to be defined, along with a healing process aligned with Mexican culture. Meanwhile, a joke about PTSD is told often among journalists: In Mexico, the prefix “post” has not arrived.
…ision satisfaction through escape, and I converted passions and hobbies into medicine to be abused. I read and wrote fiction and played video games and role-playing games not for entertainment, but to be as far out of my skin as possible. I listened to podcasts and audiobooks for hours each day to avoid hearing my own thoughts. I gave every minute of my waking life to distraction through work or distraction through consumption with the hope that I wouldn’t have to face my pain. When this didn’t work, I began to drink excessively to help dull the pain as well as my mind. I drank like someone who no longer anticipated progress.
The pothos sits atop my bookshelf. It’s budding. New growth. New life. It’s had its ups and downs, its greens and browns. This pothos once survived 48 hours trapped inside a locked car in the hot, dry Colorado summer. With just a few weeks of attention it transformed from brittled, wilted, yellowing, and barely hanging on, to a plant that stands vibrant, tall, and smiling.