An idiot on the internet

So I’m writing a blog post. I’m not sure if I want to start doing this, but it kinda feels right, so let’s give it a try. I don’t write that often. I’m not really sure why. Maybe it’s the fear that it won’t be great. I actually think I’m a really bad writer. I think that fear transcends writing and stops me from doing a lot of things. Like something’s not worth investing time in unless I’m going to be great. It’s like I defeat myself before I start. It seems like it affects a lot of people though. We get comfortable with what we’re good at, and sometimes that’s a great thing. But sometimes it holds you back. Makes you think you can’t do anything else. Or that you don’t have time to start fresh. And I think that’s why I’m doing this. An avenue to possibly start fresh.

The fresh sounds nice, but I don’t really know what it is. I can see it being a lot of things. I’m always blown away when I talk to friends that seem to have it figured out. The ones that’ve found something that they’re good with for the rest of their lives. I’m somewhat jealous of it. That contentment. I feel the need to do a lot of things. I couldn’t imagine sitting around and doing one thing for the next 40 years. And now we’re circling back, so let’s stop. Let’s start fresh. I want to keep starting fresh. I want to pursue something, and then pursue something else, and then maybe another thing. And then sometimes no things.

So I guess this blog will be about my pursuits. Or maybe it’ll be my bitch corner. Or maybe it’ll be word vomit alley. Probably that last one. But I kinda like that. I like the way these words are flowing out and if it looks like vomit to somebody, then even better. Let me vomit all over your eyes, and if you close them, then I’m still getting your eyelids. Bleh. and on a side note, I’m listening to Tennyson right now. Check them out, cause their shit is dope.

Ok, signing off. First word bile for the world to see. More to come so stay tuned.

Or don’t.

//

T