Kit Fan 鑽石山

Tom Kitsch
5 min readJun 30, 2023

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從利物浦回程的路上看完了Kit Fan的Diamond Hill,九時許的晚上月亮終於高掛。Kindle版的封面並非鑽石山,而是倒轉了的旺角,noir的色系早前在還未搬到紐約的Bleak House Books中看到,已經吸引了我。最近思鄉便在Kindle上買了來看。

取名Diamond Hill的英文書並非只有Kit Fan這一本,Feng Chi-Shun在2009年出版過一本Diamond Hill: Memories of growing up in a Hong Kong squatter village,講述他在鑽石山的成長,在喇沙書院讀書的經歷,不過就不是小說,比較上算是自傳,雖然我2017年讀來的時候,還是把他當小說讀,畢竟年代不近,讀來也像故事。

不過Kit Fan這本Diamond Hill打正旗號是一本小說,而且是一本中英夾雜的小說,文中周不時出現粵語,後再附上英文翻譯,而且佛學味道濃厚,章節甚至乎是以節氣區分,第一章就以「驚蟄」開卷。

時間回到移交前,大概是1984年,中英聯合聲明簽署當年,主角是一個從泰國回港戒毒的癮君子,經「大師」安排暫住進鑽石山的一家尼姑庵中,大家都稱呼他作佛陀(Buddha)。庵中的他並非唯一一個異數,還收容著自稱為柯德莉夏萍(Audrey Hepburn)的女子,以及視柯德莉夏萍為母親,自稱波士(Boss)的年輕女孩。

Boss年紀雖輕,卻是江湖上行走的人物,是三合會成員,但第二章「穀雨」卻提到她想移居倫敦,被Buddha問到原因,她便答:

‘Why not? I was born in this British colony. I love Great Britain. People there are so polite and sophisticated. So calm. Real gentlemen. I’ll learn to speak proper English when I move to London. One day I’ll be really British.’

她似乎認為自己身在香港地,雖然是英國殖民地,卻未非英國人,而只要到了倫敦,便可以成為真正的英國人。

而Boss反問Buddha為什麼回港的時候,Buddha便指他是聽從大師死前的指引,從黎明寺(Wat Arun)回來的。他說大師認為他需要與香港這個地方化解因怨,但他自己則認為香港沒有未來,也不會有和平,英國人離開後的十年內,中國便會把香港催殘。

He thought I needed to come back and make my peace with Hong Kong.’ ‘There’s no future in Hong Kong, I tell you. And no peace. The moment the British leave in ten years’ time, the Chinese will fuck us up big time.

不過在中國把香港催殘前,港英政府的新城市發展政策又是否真正造福人群呢?Quartz(石英,庵中的另一個暫居女子)與Buddha在「白露」一章中討論他們各自冥想時看見的影像,Quartz表示她從小腦海中可以預見很多水母,有不同的形狀與品種,後來她開始辨認每種水母所代表的情緒或思想,慢慢就只看到一隻大型的水母了。她向庵中的Iron Nun(鐵觀音,這並非書中提及的中譯,但我小時候常看古龍,看到這名字便想起楚留香,姑且如此稱之。)提起的時候,Iron Nun提示她應該從水母的角度看事物,她的視角便不一樣了。

Budhha看到的卻是一堆變幻發光又會變色的虛無,濕漉漉的,彷彿有人在其中,但又非人,捉摸不透卻又令人窒息。Quartz說那樣八爪魚。

他們又談到香港的未來,Quartz便有感而發:

‘At least you are here watching what’s actually happening. Better than those who cling on to the past.’ ‘For those who want to leave Hong Kong, I guess from their perspective, Britain is their future, their jellyfish.’ ‘How about you? Is Britain your jellyfish?’ ‘No, but Hong Kong is my octopus.’

也許無論留下來的人,或是離開的人,也無法執著過去不放,無論去留,還是會被時代洗禮,經歷變遷,差別在於離開的人視角可能要放得更遠更大,海納百川,也要轉用他人的眼睛觀看學習,而離不開,被八爪魚吸住的,可能便要在瞬息萬變中求存,但精明的也許又可以四通八達,像手持八達通(octopus)一般。

時間一點一滴地過,九十九年的租約始終會期滿,變遷始終會來臨,但在中國管理之前,港英政府的政策又是否真可幫助民生呢?Boss留意到新興的衛星城市天水圍吸引了不少鑽石山的居民,使她在該區的勢力大減,生意也有捐失。

柯德莉夏萍工作的餐館老闆請她隨他到天水圍發展,柯德莉夏萍拒絕了,卻遭到老闆大發雷霆。

‘I’ve no time for you and your ignorant types Don’t rubbish the new town if you haven’t even seen it Your whole bloody family is a fossil Can’t you see what the Communists are doing to us No wonder your son is a retard The city hasn’t even been handed over yet and they’re already stealing our land I don’t want my daughter growing up among drug addicts and the Triad I’ve already lost my husband to the white powder and the new town will be a fresh start The white powder will follow him wherever he goes You’re lucky to be allocated anywhere at all Half my profits go to pay protection money to the Triad I’m just a homeless piece of shit How much compensation money did you get from the government My parents gave me this land and even at gunpoint I’m not moving an inch You people are all traitors We must stay here and take back control Look at the state of this fucking place I can’t wait to leave It’s no longer the village it was First there was the landslide then the demolition and all the new construction works They said we’d be given first choice of the new apartments How much pocket money did you give the official Some apartments even have a sea view and we’ll be able to see the fireworks in the harbour Fuck the fireworks The British betrayed us No the Chinese are betraying us We are Chinese Dumb-ass can’t you see you’re betraying yourself and your offspring I don’t trust the Hong Kong government anymore they have sold us down the drain I just want to die here where I’ve lived all my life Sure you do bitch the rats would kill you first if not your husband and the white powder Those high fences give me nightmares Fuck the fence I don’t even have enough rice to feed the kids’

老闆認為新市鎮更好,也遠離黑市會貶毒,亦沒有鑽石山危險,忽然又有山泥傾瀉。他認為自己是中國人,而英國人始於不會為大家著想。

Buddha似乎也認同,Boss又跟她談到三人一起移英的安排時,他又指並非所有人都能到英國去,只有一少數被選中的精英會有這個機會。Boss不解,認為他老是替共產黨說話,又指大家,Buddha與Boss,的而且確是英國人。

‘Buddha, why the hell do you support the Communist wolves? Don’t forget we all have a British passport. We are British,’ Audrey Hepburn said matter-of-factly.

Buddha諷刺地回應大家當然是英國人,不過是海外的英國人,也就是BNO,而BNO基本上就是個假護照。

‘We are certainly not British. We are British Nationals (Overseas). And being BNO doesn’t give us any right of abode in Britain. It’s basically a fake passport.’

Boss強調BNO並不是本假護照,但除了跟柯德莉夏萍互相確認在想像空間中他們都是英國人之外,她也並沒有其他方法按下這股不安。

‘It’s not fake! It has the same crown, and what’s that funny animal next to the lion? It’s issued by the British government. We’re British.’ Audrey Hepburn raised her voice, searching for reassurance from Boss and me. ‘We are British, aren’t we?’ Boss gave me a knowing look and reached out to hold her mother’s hands. ‘Yes, of course, we are British.’ Sandwiched between mother and daughter who were comforting each other with lies, I couldn’t find it in myself to contradict them. I sensed the turbulence in Audrey Hepburn’s mind, and the way Boss tried to keep her mother’s inner storms at bay.

Buddha、波士與柯德莉夏萍三人本來並不相識,也無血緣關係,但隨著三人互相照顧,竟如一家人一般,似乎也像香港一樣,忽然置身了在中英之間的糾紛中,雖然是已發展城市,好比成人,卻在當中沒有說話的權利。

I wondered how there could be a custody battle when Hong Kong was already a fully grown adult and all she wanted was exactly what her parents did, the wealth of the entire globe. Boss’s hand reached under the bed and fetched a camera. ‘Stay there you two. This is a classic Polaroid family moment. This will be a great shot of the three of us lying here.’

與現實不一樣,小說中最小甚至還未成年的Boss卻是最積極要讓三人齊齊整整,一家人般離港移英的推手,也有能力做到,因為即是年紀輕,他也知道世事無常,中英聯合聲明設定的大限,以及一國兩制五十年不變的死線,都是個詛咒。Buddha與庵中主持Iron Nun談到的時候,Iron Nun也認同:

‘The Chinese and the British were not exactly saintly. What they called the Joint Declaration and the Basic Law are just another form of confusion and exploitation. There will be no peace in Hong Kong. An expiry date of 2047 is a curse.’ ‘I think it’s easier to have a sense of an ending.’

小說的每一章開首幾乎都是庵中有人失蹤,Boss是上一章「白露」中失蹤又回歸後,「霜降」這一章就輪到Quartz。Buddha甫來到尼古庵就被Quartz吸引,知道大家同樣背負著沉重的包袱,但Quartz不單止不願談她的過去,甚至連過去都遺忘了,讓他更在意她。他在天水圍追尋Quartz的時候遇到一位老人領路,那位老人又跟他講起了他的歷史,以及有可能不一樣的烏有史。

When I was ten my father fled Mainland China during the 1911 Revolution, the same year my only brother died of chickenpox. We were supposed to embark on a boat to Taipei, but at the last minute my father changed his mind and we boarded the ferry to Hong Kong. You could argue his decision completely changed the course of my life, but it would also have changed drastically if we had taken the boat to Taipei.’ ‘You’d be speaking Mandarin, not Cantonese, if you’d gone to Taipei.’ ‘That’s true. After the Revolution, Sun Yat-sen and the other revolutionary leaders got around the table to decide which language should be the official language of the new China. Did you know Cantonese only lost to Mandarin by one vote? Imagine if Cantonese had won. Everyone in China would now be speaking Cantonese.’ ‘I’m not sure the government would agree with your proposition.’ ‘Which government are you talking about? Hong Kong, the British, or the Chinese?’ ‘None of them would like the idea.’

老人提到他本來是要隨父親到台灣去的,卻因為臨上船前父親的一轉念,便到來了香港,講起了廣東話;又提到當年辛亥革命後,廣東話只要一票之差就要取代普通話成為國語。

但Buddha他們最後還是要說起英語來。Buddha後來得知Quartz被勾起了過去,無法釋懷,已經迴天乏術。而Boss已經利用她的手段人脈拿到了真正的英國護照,與Buddha及柯德莉夏萍約好幾日後到啟德機場搭國泰航班到英倫。

As they say in Britain, Cheerio!’

Cheerio這詞看Mr Ma and Son的時候才第一次知道,後來翻查老舍原文曆從只是寫:「再見」。

小說的開首是飛機從鑽石山頭頂飛過,降落啟德機場,尾聲則是三人要登機飛往倫敦。

作者Kit Fan在小說結尾後特意再加上一篇Note on Cantonese slang and profanites向讀者簡述廣東話的特性,以下簡述兩段:

Cantonese swear words are particularly agile, allowing the speaker to conjugate inventive insults through puns and metaphors. Although forbidden in mainstream media, Cantonese swear words loom large in local speakers’ imaginations and sense of humour, transcending social boundaries and taboo.

Cantonese profanities reflect a pervasive creativity integral to the vitality of the language. Though it might not mean a lot to non-Cantonese speakers, it is hoped that citing it in both Chinese and English will give a culturally distinctive inflection to a language that is under threat, not unlike the shanty town in the novel.

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Tom Kitsch

96年生,英國香港人,台大外文系畢業,正修讀倫敦國王學院比較文學碩士。