But, but, but I’ve always wanted that beautiful set AND I’ve always wanted to learn to read Tarot…
Sherry Caris

Sherry Caris, You do it and you do it well and then you can teach me. The ravages of insomnia are attacking me.Nightmares that question my internality as a man, as a devil dog. If I say do Tarot and then the nightmares assail me and I question you and myself,,,,just see, just see my internality reasserts at a late hour of quantum triangles and sorrow for Marines KIA when all I saw was body counts on a black and white tv in Marysville, Kansas in the summer of 1967. And 20 years later in summer 1987 , maybe 1988 I get confused maybe both more KIA but no tv screen with body count. I am tormented as I write this but I had to write this because you can learn and i can learn, maybe through you or with you or inspired by you. A master sergeant once told me , ‘you see everything barton, you hear everything, you know more than I’ll ever know about weird shit in the world and you have to help others and when you get to the fleet you gotta help your Marines ’cause they don’t have your weird fucking sight and gifts. — — Sorry, Sherry, this incoherent again but it is 104 percent of my rated power. You couldn’t get more out of me on this earthly pain. I am in agony and there is clarity even though the clarity is partially hidden by clouds of incoherence. wait, let me re-read your response. I have to a partial sweep to reorient…..You’re right the universe is speaking through me. I am an imperfect and fragmented vessel but you are right. Do it well and do it soon. I know you have gifts beyond many others. then maybe you can teach me or guide me or assist me. Learn deep and well. This is your ‘bounce dive’ for me. go deep and go fast, that is partly a protection to the diver to go fast to depth. I am rambling but the universe is with me to speak to you. I see you in the quantum triangles when you are with Dilly and when you are five. I am there but you can’t see me. I am there. I hope you read this in the morning light and it touches you. Read it with your open heart. My heart and mind are doing their best. Read and re-read the highlighted passage and read what I say and try to see me in the quantum triangles. I know you don’t know what that means but I do and Julian Barbour does and he is helping me help you. Do your best and that is enough for me. I hope this reaches your heart and mind this morning. I am trying like crazy to be coherent and reach you. My heart is breaking and my mind is hurting but I trudge on, the devil dog can never stop trudging. I got weird gifts and see all the weird shit others can’t see. See me, hear me, trust the core of this incoherent message. “Semper fidelis is what Marines say, we shorten it to semper fi but it really fully means everything I do and say to you is always faithful to my core as a man and your core as a woman of great gifts and our core as people who see the unseen and feel the deep waters. the deep waters . We bounce dive when others fear the very open ocean. I must stop as I am fatigued. I can’t re-read this again so I will have faith in me and you that I got it right. You and I can fill in the rough spots for each other. Write me tomorrow and let me know if I reached you. The nightmares and fatigue are killing me but goddammit I am a devil dog and I can trudge for long distances until I can lope and gallop again. Remember me and the quanutm triangles. Remember who I was and who I am . I remember who you were and who you and who you are yet to be. Done. back to bed. I will try to dream of a beautiful ‘bounce dive.’ I hope I will pass you in your ascent as I descend. Complimentary divers, complimentary spirits.

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