Finding My Way of Living
Nothing really matters outside your own perception and experience. That’s ‘Phenomenology’.
What a beautiful painting is for you might be a piece of junk for someone else. That means your whole life has its own structure. It means your have your own way of living. That might clash with others experiences and at some point, you might even get lost in the vast galaxy of infinite possibilities that offers the universe. That is perfectly understandable and it comes with its share of difficulties. If you killed God, which gives a sense to a lot of people’s life, you need to find an alternative, a substitute. That big ‘what’s the point?’ question needs to be fulfilled. Otherwise, you are likely to experience emptiness.
Philosophy comes in handy.
I am not saying that I fully handle philosophy, though I’ve spent my life trying to make sense out of everything I see and feel. I am a thinker. I have been obsessed with tons of questions, with understanding my bond with others, with finding my place in this world. Like Elijah Price (from the Unbreakable movie) says: “You know what the scariest thing is? To not know your place in this world.” That simple man gave birth to madness because of this. This simple “What is my place in this world?’’ question has overwhelmed me for decades. I got lost in my quest to find the answer and I did not find good answers until lately.
The whole system that represent your existence, whether it is experienced extrapersonnaly, interpersonnaly or from within, is so complex that it is impossible to fully control. So don’t expect to totally grasp any system at all.
—Me?
Many ways of living have provided me with parts of answers. I found peace in the middle of these lifestyles. It’s all a question of living in the present and letting go, for most of it. The past gives you regrets and the future gives your the fear of having more regrets. So I try to stick to the present.
Acknowledging yourself in the ‘now’ is how many people finds peace. Here is a quick guide through philosophies that might give sense to your existence.
Minimalism — The power of white spaces
According to Hick’s law, increasing the number of choices will increase the decision time logarithmically. What is worst than a restaurant menu? There is too many choice. Your brain tend to take more time to make a choice. And perhaps you will choose the worst meal in the menu.
Your life is like a pile of restaurant menus. Every hole is filled with something noisy, rather useless than useful. Look around you and calculate the number of things you have that you don’t use or don’t ‘see’. You have too much in your life to enjoy it simply. Get rid of what gets in the way and keep what is truly relevant to your needs, not materialist desires.
Your life is like a pile of restaurant menus.
‘Less is More’ has been democratized by the architect Mies Van Der Rohe (1886–1969) and have influenced art and design since then, pushing everyone to go to the essential. That minimalistic white space philosophy reduces the cognitive load in every experience in order to enhance your capabilities to learn, understand and act optimally toward happiness.
Lagom — The power of having just enough
Why having three cups when you are alone? One would be enough. Why not sharing this cup with your neighbours and friends? It clashes with the way we live but we don’t really need everything that we have. Like minimalism, Lagom is a contrast to materialism.
Lagom is a Swedish philosophy that does not have a real translation. It ‘suggests’ to find the right balance between your real needs and your possessions. The Lexin Swedish-English dictionary defines lagom as “enough, sufficient, adequate, just right”.
Slow — The power of reducing pressure
There is so many things we do in a day and it tends to overwhelm us. We might not see it, but there have been tons of studies that points toward the fact that we do too much without real benefits in the end. Going fast is not better, it’s heavier. You just cumulate too much.
We are connected 24/7, we go to happy hours, we go to work, we workout, we read, we walk, we eat, etc. Are we more happy? I’d say no. We might even be more unhappy without noticing. We mostly overwhelm ourselves to avoid being bored or being alone. Consequently, this pace puts a constant weight on our shoulders and gets heavier as time goes by. Try taking your time to process your ideas. Try focusing on one task rather than multitasking. Try to create slowly. Try to cook a very good meal during a whole afternoon and take your time to savour it simply, with no iPhone and no TV.
Slow movement is a cultural shift that is the opposite of our fast pace way of living. This philosophy suggests to reduce the number of tasks you do in a day and focus on those who really matters. Quality comes with good processes and processes take time.
Take your time to do what you do and leave place to natural process instead of forcing things out.
Wabi Sabi — The power of embracing imperfection
“Everything needs to be perfect.” How many times have you heard this? It is funny how everyone expects you to be perfect and fast at the same time. How many times have you seen projects that never ends, that never gets released because there is always something to improve, and felt all the pressure over yourself to do it quickly? Perfection is a concept, not a finality. You will never reach it. It’s all a question of perception.
Nature is the most prolific artist ever known and she does not care about creating perfect, permanent and complete pieces of art. She does not aim for perfection but rather for irregular chaotic evolution.
Wabi Sabi is a Japanese philosophy that does not have a precise translation as well. Nature provides the concept of ‘Imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete.’ That is quickly how you could describe it.
Conclusion
I came up with a way of living that tends to be a hybrid of all of these philosophies. I learned to let go and accept that I don’t have much power over how things were, are and will be.
You also have your own bond with the others, with the world. Take your time to understand your sensitivity toward the world. Remove everything that gets in the way in order to improve your inner peace. Having just enough will give you the opportunity to take your time for everything that is truly important to your existence. Taking your time to savour each imperfect, impermanent and incomplete moments is likely to trigger peace of mind.
Feel free to read another philosophical article I wrote recently: The Good, the Bad and the Centrist.
