From Adversity to Abundant Peace
Allow yourself to look at life without judgment and you may find the ebb and flow, or “ups” and “downs” can get very interesting. Even more interesting, as you increase your self-awareness is how you react to each experience.
In my life, I’ve had and continue to have the opportunity, yes opportunity, to enjoy a diversity of experiences. From the lowest, including a life of chronic illness, months of severe depression and losing my only daughter to premature and sudden death. To the highest, including temporary financial success and unconditional love. Through each experience, I held tight to my faith and the fact that all things in this life are temporary. There is no thing, not one experience one can name that is created in this lifetime and lasts forever. Think about it. If you come up with something, I welcome you to challenge me on it in the comments below.
Through the adversity, God has lifted me again and again. Others may look at the experiences of my day and say, “You unfortunate thing, you just can’t catch a break.” However, I see the experiences as necessary pieces building my life into something interesting and beautiful, building me into someone strong and powerful. Today was no different.
For the first time in over a year, I woke without pain and had been seizure free for over a day. I went through my morning routine and prepared to shower to be ready for the day’s physical therapy. Timing was perfect, the day was peaceful and quiet. I was full of gratitude and praise. Suddenly, with my hair full of shampoo suds, the shower stopped! Our water supply had been shut off! Due to a miscommunication between my husband and myself, the bill payment ran late (lesson learned) and the water company was not merciful.
Now, the “old” Tonya would have stressed out, blamed someone, and buried herself in a bucket of ice-cream before piling under the covered of her bed. Not today! I remained calm as I used what was left on the floor of the tub to rinse my hair and I called to confirm the status with the Water Dept. Was the supply cut off, or was there a mistake, or was there a water line issue and everyone’s was in trouble? Our bill was unpaid. We had no immediate means to pay the bill (lesson learned) and no alternative options available before the close of business on this day.
I could panic and fret, or I could accept the temporary experience as beyond my control for the moment and move on to what was within my control, the trip to physical therapy. I chose the latter because it felt better. Always, always, always choose the emotion or direction that feels better. Not the quick fix, but the satisfying solution.
I had my sight set on the satisfying solution for the “challenge” that seemed to want to crush my day and for the long-term increase of peace in my heart and my home. This mindset, anyone can adopt at will, helped me through decisions to push myself (just a bit) in physical therapy toward wellness, cloak myself with humility and ask for help with paying the overdue bill, shield myself against attack of guilt and blame( easy once your mind is at peace), and focus on what is important in every moment moving forward, living life to the fullest and to the best of my ability.
What did I learn from the ebb and flow of the day? I learned I am stronger than I thought. I am worthy of all that is good because I feel I am. I learned to try something new to increase the communication between my husband and myself (especially in regard to utility bills) and I learned I am going to be making some decisions regarding money in order that I am more aware and have a financial safety net. Part of self-sufficiency, for me, is being responsible for finances. It’s time to grow up and become more aware of what is working and what is not in my own financial life. The most important lesson of the day is that God has never left me. He allows adversity so that I can grow and so that I grow closer to Him. I am grateful He is a merciful, gracious, and dependable God.
As adversity tosses larger financial stones in my life path, I’ve considered opening a social fundraiser to ask my friends around the globe to help me meet my financial needs of caring for my health. But then, God reminds me — ‘You have all you need.’ and suddenly, I feel abundant peace once again.