I think a part of it is that one of the biggest lessons that men have been taught by society for a long time is that they have to be useful. The image of the ideal man as a bread winner, farmer, warrior, leader has been around a whole lot longer than the idea of the ideal man as being attractive to the eye.

In fact one of the reason why a muscular well proportioned male body is seen as attractive is because these things (strong arms, developed chest, strong legs) used to denote ability (can lift a lot, hunt well, fight well, run fast etc)

Most men almost across every culture are taught on some level that there is nothing worse than being a “useless” male. The definition of usefulness has changed over the millennia from hunting well, to being able to fix things around the house to being able to hold down a well paying job, but the core lesson that “there is nothing worse or more unattractive them a useless man” has held pretty firm.

These days there isn’t nearly as much of a link between what makes a man physically attractive (sexy) and what makes a man useful. Most of us don’t go to the gym to get better at our jobs, but to be better looking. It’s just that our brains haven’t entirely caught up to this yet. So when a woman admires one of us for our beauty, there is always a slight mental hesitation on our part. A voice that repeats to us that “Things of beauty are not useful. Things of beauty are too delicate to complete tasks like hunting down mastodons, building homes and doing hard work.”

On some level we are all perfectly aware that this isn’t the way it is anymore and that we go to the gym mostly to look more attractive (or “to be healthy”, which is good people euphemism for vanity lol) but on another level we aren’t entirely ok with the way things are now.

Like it or not, Brad Pitt may look amazing playing a vampire, but he looked ridiculous playing a Greek warrior.