A year later. So what’s changed?

Tony Prysten
Aug 25, 2017 · 3 min read

A year to the day since this happened. (nearly died)

And the one question I consistently get asked is, what’s changed?

And the more I get asked, the more I think about it.

And lately, I have been thinking about it a lot. So, a year later, I’ll try and answer it.

A friend who went through an illness and came out the other side told me at the time that, at first, everything is beautiful and then pretty soon, reality sets in and you remember all the shit things in life. I didn’t believe her. Probably because at the time, I was in the beautiful stage. Yep everything really was ace. The sky, clouds, walking to work, first ride, first surf, seeing Ollies first olli. And it really was amazing. For the first time since being young I was getting better at stuff really quickly because I had been so sick and weak. Every walk I was walking further, every ride stronger and the feeling was overwhelmingly awesome.

But then things flattened off. Life got back to normal and the same issues surfaced. Maybe my friend was right. The kids still argued and I yelled at them. Annie and I bickered about the same things and I could feel the chilled zen I had following the experience slipping away.

I didn’t like it, so that was when I had to remind myself that things can be a whole lot worse. Yep, even after what I went through, I still forget and can take everything for granted. I only have to think about the alternative, and my normal moments become very special, very quickly.

And that is one of the biggest changes. I really do sit back at the most normal times and feel a hard pang of gratefulness that things turned out ok. I look at everything around me all the time and stop to appreciate not only what I have but what I have seen, been a part of and felt. The flipside of that is that I do get a little obsessed with the ‘what if..?’

So what else changed? Well, those that know me, know how ridiculously nostalgic I am. That has intensified, especially with the kids. They are growing up every day. It feels like that book ‘A fish out of Water’. I want to stop feeding them! I feel those moments as a young family slipping away, and I am struggling with that. Facebook memories remind me how much things have changed every day. Another reason to dial down FB.

Before, I probably spent a lot of my time saying ‘no’ to stuff. Whether it was a trip to Europe or another fidget spinner I think my natural stance was to not let it happen. It now seems decisions big and small come a lot easier. Yep. That has definitely changed. Maybe because int the scheme of things, they are not really that big. I feel content to let a lot of things be. Why fight it? Ah, here comes that zen again.

For me, so many things are still beautiful. Time with family, waves surfed, sunrises, sunsets.. but special moments layered with the emotion of what might have been makes them so much more special.

Life is beautiful. The cliches are real.

)

Tony Prysten

Written by

Creative, Product Design & the Ocean.

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