Remember to Always Dream Big

“She said, did you think you were dreaming? And I said, no I didn’t think that I was dreaming , I just wanted it to come true”
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In 2004, I had discovered an album called August and Everything After by The Counting Crows. I don’t really remember the first time I heard it, but I remember one day in January of that year where I listened to that album over and over.

I had watched my mom collapse in front of me. The doctors had already told us that she was not going to make it without a transplant. She was rushed to the hospital via ambulance. We all spent that day by her side. We did everything we could and nothing was left to do.

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting

I sat in my car and finally drove away from the hospital.
I drove up and down route 91 in Western Massachusetts… up and down, up and down thinking of a plan. Thinking of a way to help. Thinking of a miracle. Thinking of anything. Listening to that album over and over. Crying, Hoping, Crying, And Hoping. I waited for my phone to ring with news.

On February 14, 2004, throughout a whirlwind of emotion, my mom received her miracle and transplant. 12 years later she is still here and is an amazing miracle to everyone she touches, her granddaughters, her friends and her family. Everyone is better for having her still here with us. I am fortunate for her presence, her teachings and her heart.

One thing I have been told is I am good at dealing with bad news. The honest reason is I believe bad news is just the opportunity for good news to present itself. My mom taught me that along the way.

January 2016 has started itself with some turbulence. Bad news doesn’t wait for perfect timing. I went into the hospital last week for a bad headache and some vision issues. After a very unique few days, the doctors ended up finding a tumor on my pineal gland in my brain. It is hard to get any major news about your health and not get emotional. I am a highly emotional person anyways but this has been another whirlwind. I have a tentative surgery date in mid February and waiting for some more tests and opinions. This is just another test of emotion and mental toughness. I will not waiver from who I am and what I believe. I will be good. I promised my mom.

The ironic part that made me write this post, that damn album August and Everything After was found by my five year old daughter today, randomly on iTunes. She played Round Here, first song on the album , by accident. I have been listening to it over and over as I write this. Crying, Hoping , Crying and Hoping.

Someone has a sense of humor and for that I can appreciate.

I write this post not for your emotion for me but to impact your thought process for you.

Life is hard and beautiful all at the same time.
I have spent so much time reading posts, tweets and your thoughts. I just want to lend my voice to your narrative. The secret — your dream — it is 100% possible. All of it

Think about where you are.
Think about where you want to be

And know that you are 100% in control of that destination, maybe not short term but ultimately and eternally.
No one is going to give you permission to be you. No one is going to tell you how you react to news — good or bad.
You control this “dream”

Please remember to always dream big.
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Say hello to my mom on Facebook: Theresa Surrette 😀