I turned 30! Here are 21 lessons I wish my 20-year-old self had known…
Yeah, sooner or later, it happens. You turn 30.
When I was 5 years old, I thought people over 30 didn’t have much time left and were going to die soon. I considered them old.
From a 5-year-old’s perspective, a 30-year-old is definitely much older but the good news is, turning 30 isn’t the end of the world. It’s the beginning of the next chapter stuffed with challenging and exciting experiences.
This weekend, I spent some time reflecting on the last 10 years, recalling the main milestones, achievements, failures and hard periods of the last decade.
I think this was the most intense and experience-rich period of my life so far.
This blog post plays a critical part during this reflection.
It helps organize my thoughts, and it might provide some interesting takeaways for others and also for myself for the coming decades.
This post isn’t about bragging about my achievements; rather, it is a collection of takeaways I wish I knew when I was 20, and and it includes several things I think I did right and want to share with you.
Since the time machine hasn’t been invented yet, I can’t just go back 10 years in time and make everything 100x better (I’d also buy Bitcoin!).
But rather, I can share what I have learned and also get ready for the challenges of the next decade.
I hope I can inspire fellow entrepreneurs, dreamers, and everyone who wants to make a difference and feel fulfilled in their lives.
So, here are my 21 takeaways from the last 10 years.
1. Start university, but it’s not necessary to finish it
Universities (especially tech and business-specific ones) don’t provide that much practical value. In the last 6 years, no one asked about my degree or the courses I took. Everyone I worked with in the tech sector was interested in the real-life experiences I had accumulated.
Real, useable skills are worth much more than credits and good grades from a university. I wish I had spent less time focusing on my university studies.
You might wonder, why should you start university at all? See section 2.
Note: If you want to be a doctor, then obviously, go and finish your university degree.
2. Make more friends, many more!
University is a great place to meet like-minded people. I met my best friends there and got to know incredibly talented people. I recommend attending events where you can meet up with these people. But, don’t just spend time with people similar to you; go and meet people who have complementary skills so you might work together in the future.
Making friends and expanding your network will accelerate your career potential and open up new opportunities.
I was lucky that my education was entirely free. If you have to pay a fortune in tuition fees, then starting university might not be the best idea.
3. Study or work abroad
If you can’t let university go, then study abroad. If you can, then go work abroad. Meet people with different cultural backgrounds, experience the diversity and learn how to be a productive member of an international team.
Studying abroad might be expensive, so if you can afford only a limited time abroad, then go for an exchange semester.
All in all, go abroad to work or study. This will transform your mindset. Trust me, this is such a positive experience you will never forget.
4. Experiment and risk more
Use your early 20s to figure out what you really enjoy doing and are interested in. Test your ideas and experiment with different jobs and projects. Find yourself, and find what you really want.
(Sorry if that sounded like a Paul Coelho quote.)
5. Travel as much as possible
When you start working, you will have less flexibility and free time. When you have kids, you will have even less free time.
I’m glad I listened to my mother and traveled when I was younger.
Use your university time to discover the world. Don’t stress that much about putting aside as much money as possible. You will have more money in the future but less time and flexibility.
6. Don’t believe everything people say, word for word
Everyone tells stories, and stories usually sound much better than what actually happened. Be more skeptical and less naive. Stay rational.
7. Don’t deflate your achievements
I have years of experience doing this. I always thought my achievements were less valuable than others’. I always felt that the things I was doing were inferior to the things others had done.
This is a deadly combination: deflating your own achievements while inflating others’.
This will cause a huge gap and function as a highway to depression.
Never think the achievements you unlocked are worth less than others’ just because your mental distortion inflated their successes. Most people like to seem bigger, smarter, and more successful than they actually are. Take that into consideration.
8. Struggle leads to growth
I have read countless stories about entrepreneurs and managers making a meaningful impact by building companies or saving one from collapse. These stories rarely mention the hardships, the struggle, and the emotional rollercoaster that naturally comes with working something meaningful.
It took me years until I realized that other people struggle as well even though their struggles may not be visible from the outside.
Remember, if it were easy, everyone would do it.
9. People can’t define you
Everyone has opinions, and opinions are seldom facts. It’s so embarrassing to admit, but I considered way too long other people’s opinions as facts.
If someone has an opinion about you, take it with a grain of salt. Chances are, they probably are missing context and don’t see the whole picture, especially when someone is judging you without providing any constructive feedback.
Only pay attention to constructive feedback and ignore others. A single opinion is not what everyone thinks.
10. Stand up for yourself
If something isn’t right, let it be known. Don’t be afraid to honestly share your ideas and opinions.
11. Ask and give more feedback
Receiving feedback accelerates learning, as does giving feedback to others. Seek feedback and ask peers, friends, colleagues or the internet. Give constructive feedback to others. Get a mentor who can give you feedback and help you set yourself up for success.
12. Ignore negative, energy-vampire people
Don’t be afraid to end the relationship. Don’t be afraid of what others might think. Don’t care about people who are just energy-sucking vampires. You won’t learn anything from them.
13. Never stop learning
If I stopped learning new skills 10 years ago, then now I would be working for a huge company doing some copy-paste magic in an Excel sheet until automation could replace me.
I recommend you always work on something on the side. Work on building new skills that will lead to the next career level, making you irreplaceable in the long-term.
14. Rest more
Having rest and disconnecting from this busy life plays a critical role in productivity. Get out, go hiking, and do sports to disconnect. Manage your energy, not your time. Go for a long weekend holiday every three months.
Putting in 50+ hours per week will destroy your health for marginal gains. All that matters are the results, not the hours you put in.
15. Set goals
Hold yearly reflections and think about the things that went bad and the things that went well. Set goals and have a strategy for the next year, and have a vision for the coming 3–5–10 years.
16. Focus, focus, focus
Focus on the things that will help you get there. Ignore everything else. Never spread yourself thin; you will end up being busy without having much progress. If you think you have too many things to focus on, then use Warren Buffet’s prioritization technique to set your priorities.
17. Be clear about the things you can and can’t control
It doesn’t make sense to think about the things you screwed up in the past. You can’t change them; it’s over. Let them go.
In the present, there are things you can and can’t control. Don’t spend time thinking about the uncontrollable things. It’s a waste of energy since you don’t have any influence on them.
18. Your health is above everything else
There are just 3 things you need to do to significantly improve your health and stay healthy.
1. Do sports regularly. Go and do it; you will be much more productive, and you will have done something good for your health.
2. Eat well: never compromise on food. Eating bad-quality food to save a few bucks is the perfect way to accumulate health problems in the long-term. Eventually, you will end up paying much more on medicine and doctor visits.
3. Sleep well: don’t watch that stupid horror movie at 11 pm, because it will ruin your sleep quality.
All in all, treat your body like a temple. This is the only place you can live.
19. Have an investor mindset
Don’t buy the latest MacBook, iPhone and other physical goods just because they’re newer and trendier. Invest in experiences and things that have long-term potential to increase value (bonds, stocks, property etc). Don’t buy a car if it’s not critical to use it every single day.
20. Take action
Talking about stuff is not action. Reading books isn’t action. Thinking about stuff isn’t action.
Action is when you get your hands dirty; it’s when you get out and try to apply the things you have learned. You sometimes win, and you sometimes lose. That’s action.
21. Don’t follow others blindly
Don’t follow the path of others just because what they do looks cool or because they have a high salary. If you spend time discovering yourself through trying yourself out in different roles and projects, eventually you will end up doing the things that excite you. That’s your path.
Conclusion
Those are my 21 takeaways from my last 10 years. I really hope some of the takeaways here will inspire you to make changes in your life.
I would love to know what your takeaways are from your last 10 years. Feel free to share them in the comments below.
About me:
I’m a marketer working for a cool software development agency and I also build and launch applications on the side. You can follow my wins and struggles on my blog. I share everything.
Photo by Paul Gilmore on Unsplash