A combined effort of new year’s resolutions

It’s probably a coincidence that I’ve been seeing and reading a lot of New Year’s resolutions/self improvement posts in the last few days because of 2016, the new beginning. And I thought that these are some I should try to be true to: a step towards growth.

  1. From tumblr: “Miss out on the random turn ups. Less online “link ups”. Put your phone down & Surround yourself with people who genuinely care for you.”

I think this one is important because I realize I spent a lot of the time in college, in the last year, thinking about my status with other people. Looking on snapchat and instagram and wondering why I’m not hanging out with these people or those, trying to figure out why they don’t like me/why I haven’t found a niche or friend group as tightly knit/have as much fun as other people. And I spent a lot of my time dwelling on why I’m not those things, when the people in those groups aren’t people I would get along with due to differences in values, interests, and personalities anyway.

I think this idea is important because looking back on it, this past year I know there are friendships that I did make that have true value in them, and I found them with people I least expect to. A whole bunch of people in the year above me, a few in the year below. And I’ve found that these are the people I can talk to, the people I can hit up to go to events with, and the people that can relate to me on one level or another. And these are the relationships that I need to concentrate on and build, because there is really something there other than just a snapchat sweep of all the people you’re hanging out with, or cute pictures and poses on facebook.

It’s that idea of concentrating and focusing on what you have, rather than what you don’t, and meeting the unexpected blessings in between. People hang out, people have friends all over the place, good for them. And I’m going to stop comparing my life and my friendships to theirs. I have good things too, in other places.

2. From medium, “‘Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.’ The smaller the gap between what you should do, and what you actually do — the happier you will be.”

I find it hard, especially in my relationship, to be myself because the way I react to things and the way I feel emotionally, is very different from the way I want to think and feel. Because I want to be selfless, I want to be understanding, but there are circumstances where I am just not, and I can’t control the way I feel.

But I’ve come to know that in being true to myself and communicating out these feelings, I grow and mature towards the mindset that I want to have. Trying to understand something is better than just faking your feelings towards it and blowing up in the end; Trying to figure out the source of selfishness is better than being untrue to my feelings.

3. From medium: “Put ‘The Important’ Before ‘The Urgent.’ Happy people always put the important stuff first. Not only important, but important and non-urgent. The important stuff includes exercise, reading good books, setting goals, writing in your journal, and spending time with those you love. None of these things are urgent. We could easily put these things off until tomorrow — which is ultimately never. The most happy and successful people in the world spend most of their time on the important.”

I do want to journal more. It makes me happy, it makes my thoughts come to life and my feelings tangible instead of unorganized in my head. I want to work out, I love the feelings I have after I run, just for a little bit. But I always feel like I never have time for these things because there is always work, always a meeting, always things that seem to hold more importance.

But I know it’s important to do things to make yourself happy, to love yourself.

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