Why I’m here.
Hello. Trevor Lyon is not my real name.
I am a 32 year-old man. I was born in May 1984. I live in a city in the north of Ireland. I am writing a blog about my struggle with alcohol for two reasons. The first is because I find it therapeutic, and therefore helpful for my mental wellbeing. There are small, helpful, occasions of catharsis found by expelling thoughts onto paper. The second is because I feel that at this time, in this culture, in this part of the world, we need to talk about and understand our ingrained attitudes to alcohol more openly and calmly.
I have been diagnosed with chronic dipsomania, a manic urge to consume alcohol until I black out or collapse. I simply cannot just have one drink. It’s all or nothing. I have caused and found myself in the middle of terrible situations, and brought hurt to those I love the most. Dipsomania is not uncommon. The only path toward recovery is total abstention. As I write I have been sober for six and a half weeks. I am currently undergoing a course of psychoanalytical treatment that is seeking to uncover the root causes of my addiction from a charity in the city I live in. I am extremely lucky to have access to such a service, and will do all I can in the future to ensure that it is able to continue its invaluable work for the community here.
The aim of this blog is to document my experience as I progress through treatment and abstention. If this blog corresponds with anyone going through similar experiences, then I hope you will find hope and encouragement to seek help.