The Lawn Incident

Let me preface this by saying that my yard was in disarray. My ‘grass’ is really just a bunch of weeds that just happen to be (mostly) green, they were at the height of just below the knee.

My son and I were gingerly walking down the sidewalk (just minding our own business), when we came to our neighbors house two doors down. Upon walking past, they (having a pristine yard) were working on their yard, with all their fancy tools and equipment (just typical things needed to maintain a yard). Saying hello nicely, we started some casual chit-chat. After a bit, the husband, kindly offered to bring his lawn-mower to mow my yard.

I thought to myself, “this is great, so kind of him” and told him the same. Upon walking away and thinking about it, I had a weird sickly feeling in my gut. I believe this feeling would be called ‘emasculating’.

Not really having this feeling before, I immediately went in and told my wife the only logical thing. “We have to get a lawn mower right now!”

As our kind neighbor came over and started mowing our lawn, I held my 3 year old son in dismay (my fatherly image forever scared). I couldn’t tell our nice neighbor to stop, but I couldn’t not be there when he did it (that would be rude, right?). I offered to just use his lawn mower, and I would operate, but he insisted. So there I stood… watching… this act of “kindness”…

Maybe this shouldn’t be as big of deal to me as it is. What is wrong with me? I mean, he is just being kind and offering a friendly service. But — who the heck does this guy think he is? Mowing my lawn… Does he know he is taking something from me (or at least it feels like he is)? I doubt it.

I now have my own lawn mower (thank God). Purchased the day after this incident. Purchased from an 87 year old woman — who still mows her lawn and has been doing so for the last 20 years (adding to my emasculation). With my newly acquired grass(weed, in my case)-killer, I used it to mow with such pride. It felt good. It felt right. I am not sure that I will ever recover from what was taken from me in the incident, but mowing my own lawn will have to do for the time being.

End exaggeration and manly vulnerability.

I’d love to hear from you:
@trevorrday /

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