And invited her out of her internal prison — I’ve invited my lover Captain to come over tonight. I’m hoping we’ll go swimming at the YMCA first, then out to the beach where we’ll have sex under the cover of darkness and a blanket. I like to go swimming with him because he used to be a Navy diver…

What’s working, what’s not working, and what’s puzzling me — I’ve been reading a lot of “polyamory gone wrong” stories lately, and wondering why our bedroom experiment hasn’t self-destructed, too. A lot has changed for the better in our marriage since the night almost two years ago when I suggested Hubs seek sex outside it. And since this is my…

Because sometimes I need hugs, too — Hubs went on a date with a new man last night. He’s not as satisfied with our throuple as I am. He’s still interested in adventuring around. Meanwhile, I’ve been pulling back a little from Captain (aka HoneyBear). In the beginning of our relationship, which started about 15 months ago…

Thinking about our 40 years together — Hubs and I are coming up on our 40-year anniversary in a week or two, and I’ve gotten into a philosophical mood. So many thoughts are roiling around in my head, I want to put a few of them down here. Those who follow me know that about two years…

The nuts and bolts of our outside man — Captain hadn’t been over for awhile. Hubs and I were both sick and he was reluctant to enter our den of contagion. But finally, two weeks into our exhausting and noisy (coughing) illness, we both got on antibiotics and Cap decided it was safe to come for a sleepover. …

And spend some time frolicking in the motel pool — When Hubs said he didn’t want to go to my annual family reunion, I completely understood. It’s a two-week onslaught of 24-hour-a-day socializing that only the hardiest souls can endure. He promised to drop in once or twice for the day and that suited me fine. When he’s there, I…

How can I make my stars align? — I made more money on Medium last month than I ever dreamed possible, by which I mean $1,233! It’s a record for me and far beyond any other month’s earnings. Hooray! It was a truly exciting adventure — one that had me waking up each night around midnight to check…

And what opening the marriage is teaching me now — A comment I read on a story yesterday made me think twice. “I think it’s remarkable that you endured 38 years of mediocre intimacy only to find out that your husband liked men. So the issues weren’t you. But the solutions fell on you,” wrote Bob Grant. I had never…

And our marriage has improved dramatically since then — I knew a woman when I was younger whose husband had left her when he realized he was homosexual. I thought it was a horrible fate. What did it say about her? I wondered. Was she such an unappealing woman that she turned her husband gay? What an idiot I…