Oh here you go again with the low key ad hominems. You are perfectly entitled to believe what you want, but wouldn’t you agree that it’s pretty disrespectful (and intellectually dishonest) to label someone‘s beliefs/conclusions/experiences “pretend” or “delusional” when you don’t even know them?
Furthermore, the concept of “ patriarchy” as it applies to The West is very much in dispute both academically and in popular opinion.
Here’s just one example (admittedly not scientific): https://www.debate.org/opinions/are-we-still-living-in-a-patriarchal-society
Or, here’s a fun read: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Patriarchy
When your frame of thinking is primarily ideological (feminist, in your case) and thus tied strongly to your sense of identity, you will naturally respond to any questioning of your narrative as a personal attack, and respond in kind.
This leads not to fruitful discourse (in order to “make a better society for all”) but to divisive rhetoric. Which is a shame, because you are a decent writer who brings up some great points around sensitive topics.