Energetic Empathy

The more you control your own life, the less you care about other people and how they live theirs

Troy Erstling
6 min readOct 11, 2018

My “bagunça-ness”

For much of my life I’ve been a messy person. I don’t pick up after myself. My room is usually full of empty cups, my clothes are hanging up on my furniture, and I’ve never been in the habit of making my bed.

Over the years while living on my own I like to think that I’ve marginally improved, but if I’m honest with myself, the word “marginal” would be generous.

Perhaps I pick up after myself more frequently, but the core underlying habits of being a generally messy person are still there. I’ve never developed the mindset of “tidy”. Neat, clean and organized.

I’ve never really had a compelling reason to change. It’s never legitimately harmed me in a negative way, so I’ve never really fixed the habit.

Then one day a friend of mine walked into my room. I like to call him “Mr. Miyagi” or “my personal Buddha”, because he’s a black-belt in Jiu Jitsu and has a subtle way of dropping bombs of truth on you in one-three words.

He comes into my room and simply says “Que bagunça!” (what a mess!), and then starts cleaning for me.