The thing that concerns me the most is the fact these programs don’t even come close to doing what they say they do.
Shelter services do nothing to help their clients address the problem of domestic abuse, and despite the fact they may be in the process of divorce and relocated away from their designated abuser, (which is considered the preferred outcome in the industry) clients have no way to avoid getting themselves into the same kind of relationship again.
Even if shelter programs were interested in allowing their clients to learn about intimate partner abuse and all its many incarnations and complex causes, there is no mechanism in place to provide that information. Any shelter hoping to get funding from federal sources is required to follow the feminist ideology, and they must demonstrate their ability to do so.
Programs are designed for the client who is suffering the kind of beatings and mental abuse by her husband as portrayed on TV, where the woman has no responsibility for the situation at all. In real life this is a remarkably rare occurrence, but feminists believe it is the ONLY way it ever happens. Much of the indoctrination process is devoted to making the client believe her situation was the same as on TV.
If she completes the program, gets herself a menial job and/or signs up for welfare, she still does not have any realistic understanding of her previous situation. She and her children may emerge from the shelter milieu damaged even further, with no emotional support or anything but the suspicion and fear of all men instilled by the shelter’s indoctrination.
Any boys she may have that are under the age of 12 and allowed to go through the process with their mother will wonder why it is they are so bad, even if they have tried to help their mother in violent situations (and they often do in some way) before entering the shelter.
If she does find another relationship, chances are it will be abusive; no matter whether the relationship is hetero- or homosexual.
Meanwhile the DV industry congratulates itself on another success, because they are there only to provide temporary housing, with divorce and relocation assistance to ensure the woman cannot or will not try to be a stay-at-home mom.
While the internet and VAWA were still relatively new, (circa 2000 or 2001) I can recall seeing a website for a Duluth-based program that had a big message on its home page that went something like this:
We cannot fix your relationship! We do not fix marriages! If that’s all you want, you need to find a different program!
Since it was the black background with neon-colored text typical of the day, it was doubly hideous to me. Yet I had to grudgingly give them points for trying to be honest. Needless to say, that website didn’t last long.