We keep trying and failing dismally. Why?

We all hear that Failure is the Mother of Success. However, most of the time people find it nothing more than just a few words of consolation. We keep trying and failing at something, and we act as if we are one step closer to finding a way leading to the success, although it’s sheer self-deception. Not everyone can be success, so what is so wrong with us perceiving the concept of failure as so-called mother of success?

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am the true fan of this statement, I’ve kept falling down and getting up all the time since I was a ten-year-old-kid weeping bitterly because I was not chosen as the member of my high school’s Math team. The thing is, how we literally define failure is the true key of success. In my opinion, people have their own definition of failure based on the two main sources: society and by themselves.

In my country, especially in big cities, going to college is a must. With heavy hearts, children who can’t pass the exam are constituted the ashamed losers, although they can be very talented in some other specific areas that are wholly different from the majors of the universities they are forced to go to. One of my friends had to study abroad because his parents couldn’t stand the truth that he couldn’t go to the University of Medicine and Pharmacy. A lot of people cannot overcome the prejudice that irrationally defines their success and failure. Failure shaped by society is somehow the most common failure that can lead you to nowhere but the tepid downcast destination.

“Dropping out of the college? Don’t tell me that he gonna be the next Bill Gates, such a big loser who never gets a B+.”

“Her business went bankrupt after 1 year! Her dad should be ashamed of his daughter who can do nothing but throw a ton of money through the windows.”

You have to accept that ugly truth maybe good for you, but with those who only try to judge your failure instead of giving advices, you’d better ignore them.

You are the only person who has the right to judge your own success. Have you ever been so staggered at your friend who kept crying when getting an A instead of A+? Because she had her own definition of a successful test, so next time you see it, you should not be surprised.

However, this can inadvertently lead to serious bias in favour of your success or against your failure. I have a quick tip for you: think about what mission of your life is, and then build specific goals to achieve your mission, setting goals and making sure it is inevitable that you will accomplish them is such a big topic that I need to gloss over, hoping that I can write about it in near future.

Once you have your clear goals, make some plans to fulfill these goals, start tracking your daily work, stick to your plan, and then you can precisely evaluate your result as a failure or success. By scrutinizing the comprehensive process, you may figure out the assertion that success is an ongoing journey, so be kind to yourself when judging your failure.

Next time you fail, try to understand that with careful reflection, investigate the root of your failures and work towards avoiding them in the future.

“Forget about the consequences of failure. Failure is only a temporary change in direction to set you straight for your next success.”
Denis Waitley