Prayer is About Relationship
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There is a profound and powerful lesson from one of Jesus’ last moments on Earth, and I wanted to share it with you today. Since coming back to Christ, one thing that has really changed in my life is prayer and my understanding of it. When I was teaching and writing New Age or personal growth material, prayer was about “manifesting” and creating an outcome in the world. It was about connecting my “inner divinity” with “Source” so that I could “vibrate” at a higher level and “attract” that which I wanted.
All of that sounds really compelling on face value, however today I have a much different perspective — and Jesus’ moments in the garden of Gethsemane, right before He was arrested, are an eternal reminder of the value and power of prayer.
And he withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.” And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him. And being in agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground.
Luke 22:42–44
This is such a touching moment that the gospel reveals. Jesus expresses His desire to be delivered, with the stress being so great He even sweat drops of blood. I’ve been through some really stressful situations in my life, but I can tell you that I have never sweat drops of blood. Imagine not only knowing what was in store for you, but knowing every single detail (because you are omniscient) ahead of time. It is no wonder He wanted to be delivered from such a horror.
Yet despite this human moment, we must remember that Jesus is God and also one with God. Just like His mother Mary, when she was visited by the angel Gabriel, said “thy will be done” — so too do we see Jesus’ obedience and submission to God even in His darkest hour. It wasn’t His will, but God the Father’s will that He prayed to be done. He brought his worries, grievances and fears to the Father, and voiced them, yet ultimately acknowledged the divine plan for His life and surrendered.
Today we live in a very confusing time spiritually. Not only has the New Age personal growth movement with its focus on us being our own gods infiltrated every aspect of life, but within Christianity’s own ranks have arisen wolves in sheep’s clothing that have made God out to be a magical lamp that you can use to get health, wealth and prosperity just by invoking the Messiah’s name.
But in the bible there are many examples of prayers going unanswered. Paul, the most prolific evangelist, had a thorn in his side that he asked Christ to free him from 3 times, and 3 times he was denied because Christ told him that His strength is sufficient for him and that Paul’s faith would be perfected in weakness. Whether this was a real thorn or a metaphor for a trial of some kind is besides the point. Job is another classic example of suffering being part of God’s will as a test of faith, and so is Joseph, who was sold into slavery by his own brothers for 20 pieces of silver.
But what does this have to do with prayer?
When we pray, first and foremost it is simply about practicing our relationship with God. It is about practicing gratitude, so that we do not drift into complaining and misery and despair because of the world. When we exist in these emotional states we have forgotten God’s promises and God’s sovereignty over creation, so we must be careful.
Prayer is also about practicing humility, because when we pray to God we acknowledge that we are powerless without Him. Lastly, it is about practicing our love for God by simply spending quality time with Him and talking to Him. Perhaps you talk about what you’re feeling, or perhaps you bring forward things you are worried about or are struggling with. Or maybe you just say, “Wow, Lord, you have such a way of putting things together, it’s truly amazing.”
The modern culture of today will have you believe that prayer is about getting something or creating something in the material world. Sadly, this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Nothing happens on Earth if God doesn’t will it into existence, this is why building a habit of “thy will be done” is crucial for your faith. Sometimes we pray for deliverance from something, and it is not yet time to be delivered because God in His sovereign wisdom knows you need to bake a little more in that heat. It’s not fun, but it is the truth.
If you are struggling financially, and it’s God’s will for your life to learn to be more dependent on Him and less in love with money, then you can pray for prosperity “in Jesus name” all day — it is not going to happen. If you do get a windfall, then it was God’s will for you to be done with that challenge for the time being — but none of us know or can “claim” the outcome because we are not God.
In the end, you either believe that God is sovereign and in total control or you believe that some level of effort on your part or the part of others can somehow twist God’s arm into doing something for you. Personally, I’m going to go with the first one. But if that’s the case, then prayer is not about the outcome but about our relationship to God. We are told to “pray without ceasing” and “in everything give thanks” (1 Thessalonians 5:17–19).
Today I pray frequently throughout the day, although my longest prayer is usually at night before bed. Nevertheless it is the practice of open communication that matters, and prayer for me has developed into an ongoing conversation with God rather than a ritualistic thing that I do at a given time. I definitely have a while to go until I get to the point of “praying without ceasing” — but I know nothing is impossible for God.
When we are attached to the outcome it always leads to spiritual failure. If you are attached to an outcome in your prayer, and it is not God’s will yet, then you will not get what you want and begin to build disappointment and maybe even resentment against your loving Father. I am guilty of this, and it frustrates me how weak my mind can be sometimes.
On the other hand, if you do get what you want, the ego will be eager to jump in and claim that victory because of your prayers, or because of other people’s prayers on your behalf or your manifestation ability or that course you took on creating your life or whatever else — giving glory to man and his effort rather than to God for having willed something great in your life as a gift to you.
It is really funny, but also something we need to be very mindful of because the bible warns many times of the dangers of success and the dangers of taking credit for the outcome. God does not need your prayers or for you to pray without ceasing. You and I need to pray without ceasing because we need God, and the more we can pray the more in relationship with God we are.
Pray every day from the heart, say thank you when you first open your eyes in the morning. Give thanks before you eat, make a list of those in your life and your intentions for them and offer them to God. Before you sleep give thanks and bring your worries before the Lord. It will all be done on His time, but in the meantime you’ve gotten closer to Him and that’s all that really matters.
Life can sometimes be overwhelming and the journey we walk with God is often filled with difficulties, setbacks and discouragement. It is during these times we need to lean into prayer, build a habit of gratitude and meditate on the words of scripture which remind us of God’s glory, promises and love.
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