This is true and I’m glad you made this point. Because the problem with what he’s saying is that he isn’t running the experiment and neither are you: you both are imagining this scenario.
True enough. Though to be fair, the results of the thought experiment are supported by your agreement that men are more likely to approach women, so are we just splitting hairs at this point? I’m fine moving past his experiment, we can have our own conversation.
But for me, this is my life. It can be scary to be constantly approached by men who want your attention. It can be dangerous. The DoJ estimates 40% of female homicide victims are killed by intimate partners. That’s a genuine statistic.
Though anecdotal, that’s a fair point, and one i’m entirely sympathetic towards. I sympathize entirely with women who are inundated with unwanted male attention, that has to be frustrating to deal with over the long term. I would suggest for a moment though that you consider the male experience which is the polar opposite. We are almost never approached by women, we are expected to do the approaching. Consider the effect the lack of female attention, combined with rejection after rejection, combined with the societal expectation that men be brimming with confidence, does to the male sense of self-worth. We’re told we must be confident in order to attract women, yet such a large portion of our interaction with women works counter to developing that confidence. Your point is well taken, just recognize that the situation isn’t much better for the guys either.
As to the 40% statistic, that refers to women being the victims of intimate partners, and so isn’t very applicable to being approached by strange men.
Yes, people often say women are more likely to be pursued by men. Using that to claim women aren’t also unfairly treated by some men, or hurt by some men is asking me to ignore where it comes from.
That’s not a claim I’ve made. I acknowledge that women are hurt by men. What i don’t acknowledge are writers posting anecdotal stories about their own individual experiences, then using those experiences to claim that all (or even most) men behave such and such a way, or to support the notion that women are oppressed and have less rights then men. It’s folly.